Kohler Five

5dB

2011-04-27T23:45:00.004-05:00

Courtney has a profound hearing loss. When she was diagnosed in June of 2008 she had no responses at 120dB. She maxed out the equipment. Now, however, with those amazing "ears" Sassy Pants can hear speech sounds at 5dB and can hear at 15dB across all frequencies!!! I am so excited I don't know what to do with myself!!! I never thought normal would be so amazing!

3 Reasons I am Thankful for CI's

2011-04-17T00:47:00.002-05:00

1. The kids and I were at a fun indoor/outdoor restaurant yesterday for lunch with a friend and her kids. As my friend, Erin, and I were chatting away I heard the loud speaker, "Will the mother of Courtney please come to the front." I wasn't sure if Courtney was hurt or what. I walked in to see Courtney standing in front talking to a worker. As soon as she spotted me she said with both hands out to the side, "Mommy, there you are! I couldn't find you!"

While I am so happy she can say all of that, I am most thankful that my profoundly deaf little girl can say her name. No signing. She can tell someone when she is lost. She can tell them her name! She is independent. Something 2 and a half years ago we didn't know if she would be able to do. I love it!

2. This morning Courtney comes running into my room and says as she points to both of her ears, "I want my ears on." I tell her to go get a battery. Without her ears on she says back, "Get a battery?" I sleepily nod my head yes. A few minutes pass and she bolts back into my room and yells, "I can't find my cochlear implants!" Yep, at 3 1/2 she knows she wears cochlear implants and knows they are different than hearing aids. She knows when they work, when they are on the wrong ear and when they need a new battery. And she can TELL me all of that! She amazes me! I love it!

3. I love the sound of her sweet voice. Something she wouldn't have without CI's. What is funny is when I tell her, "Oh Courtney I love your voice!" She always says, "Mommy, I'm not a boys I am a girl." I guess voice and boys sound similar! It cracks me up every time! Her sweet voice the other day saw mine and Bryan's wedding picture. She told me I was a princess and Bryan was the bad guy! I love it!

Love Bug Logan

2011-03-21T21:18:00.004-05:00

Oh I just love this little boy! He is 100% boy. Let me share a story - WARNING - this is a little graphic. Mom came to visit about a month ago. We were doing our normal thing getting the kids bathed and ready for bed. At this age Courtney and Logan still shower or bathe together so we were shuffling them out of the bath and into their rooms to get their jammies on. I was drying off Courtney and Logan was standing in front of Mom facing me. He was, you know, playing with himself. I give him the look and tell him, "Logan, stop touching your penis."

He quickly responded with his head tilted to one side and a glint in his eyes, "I'm not Mom, I'm touching my balls."

Trying not to laugh, I said, "Well then stop touching your balls."

Right as I said this his naked self leaps by me. He whips around and says, "You stop touching your balls Mom!"

I looked at Mom who could hardly keep a straight face and we just all started laughing. I couldn't even discipline him. Who says that?! He is always saying funny things like that. I can't remember if I shared this one before, but it is worth repeating if I have. At our old ward (church) there was an older gentleman who always gave candy out to the kids. The first Sunday of every month is fast Sunday. One fast Sunday we were on our way home from church. The kids were talking about different things they learned, etc. Logan then proceeds to tell Jeremy, "Jeremy, we didn't get any candy today because the "Candy Man" only gives us candy on slow Sundays." It still makes me laugh!

Logan has a sweet spirit about him. He is all boy, but still loves to snuggle up and come in for a fix. I am going to be so sad when he stops wanting to cuddle. Every night we have to do a hug, kiss and a nose fight! He has such a tender heart and is sensitive, but in a much different way than Jeremy. The time apart from Jeremy is killing him. He misses Jeremy so much. I asked what he missed about Jeremy and he told me, " I miss everything about him."

He is playing T-ball and loves the fact that Bryan is coaching. Bryan just bought him a new glove so he has been practicing catching. If he could, he would do nothing but play baseball. He still wants to sleep in his baseball pants every now and again. At his opening ceremonies last weekend I couldn't help but envision us being at those ball fields for many years to come!

This week Logan will be sporting a look he left for a while - glasses. We went ahead and got a second opinion since his right eye still turns in a little after two surgeries. His eyesight is the same in both eyes which is good, but is 20/30. Not too bad. The plan for the next month is to see if maybe his eye will straighten out with the glasses. The doctor isn't too hopeful since he is only a little farsighted. So we should be scheduling a third eye surgery in the next month. I will keep you all posted!

As you can see in his picture he did lose a tooth. Well, he had it pulled because a long time ago he fell and killed his tooth (I am not sure if that is how you explain it?). It was fine for a few years, but then it became infected so out it came. He was pretty excited because he was the first Kohler kid to lose a tooth and have the tooth fairy come!

That just about sums up my little love bug. I sure love my boys! There is definitely something special about them! Keep us laughing Logan, we love you!

My Sweet Jeremy

2011-03-18T22:15:00.005-05:00

It seemed like it would take forever until I would be standing at the airport watching an airplane take off with my sweet Jeremy in it. We told him when he was seven he could fly alone to California. A week ago tomorrow I was there in the Austin airport squeezing him goodbye and packing his bags with extra gum, candy, books and movies. Where has the time gone? He seems all grown up!

He is having the time of his life out there. He spent this first week with Bryan's grandma and grandpa (Gigi and Grandpa) and next week with my parents (Momo and Bobpa). I was so nervous no one would be at the gate for him when he got there, but of course Gigi and Gpa were both there with plenty of time to spare. I am not sure who was more excited, them or Jeremy? They scooped him up and got him pizza from one of our favorite pizza places in CA. I asked him tonight what his favorite part so far has been. He told me, "Watching the first three episodes of Star Wars over and over." Gigi has truly spoiled him rotten with games, toys, movies, and milk shakes!

One treasure Jeremy may not realize until later in life is the opportunity he had to go with Gigi and Gpa to the Pearl Harbor Survivors meeting last Sunday. Gpa has been doing several speaking engagements at different schools, parades, political gatherings, etc. recounting his experience at Pearl Harbor. Here is one of his amazing stories. They meet once a month at Fudruckers. Gpa is one of the youngest survivors and we are so thankful for his dedication and service for our country.

Next week Jeremy is going with my parents to Monterey to camp. It is supposed to rain so we shall see what happens. He's excited and definitely looking forward to playing with his cousins. Can't wait to see pictures!

Jeremy is an amazing kid with a heart of gold. He continues to always help us with anything as well as his brother and sister. He is so smart, and truly loves to learn. He just started piano lessons and is loving it. His teacher told him he has a bright future in music! Jeremy loves playing, writing, legos and Star Wars! That kid knows every character, planet, scene from those movies. I can't keep my own kids' names straight let alone movie characters!! He has had a rough few months between pneumonia, strep throat and a double ear infection. I think before all of this he has only had to have antibiotics once or twice at the most. I don't know what happened this year!!

He did finally start losing teeth. About a month and half ago he lost his first tooth. Amen! His second one fell out about two weeks ago. I came in one morning to wake the boys up for school and he was so upset because the tooth fairy didn't come. I asked him where he put the tooth and he said under his pillow. I asked him how come he didn't tell me he lost his tooth. No reply. Then I had to turn on the light to find the tooth. I reassured him that the tooth fairy surely came, she just wasn't able to find the tooth like we weren't able to. Whew! So the next night the tooth fairy came!

He is growing up so fast, in fact, the doctor said he is the average size of an eleven year old! He is definitely a Kohler! I am so thankful for my sweet Jeremy. I miss him tons this week while he is in CA, but I know he is having the best time and creating memories that will last a lifetime. Have fun Jeremy, we love you!

Merge

2011-03-16T23:12:00.003-05:00

I'm getting my mojo back!! I realized today how much I love to write and how it helps me process through things. More importantly, it documents what is going on with my amazing kiddos! So, here's the latest of what's been going on for me.

I haven't written a whole lot about work, but the time has come that I do. For the past 5 1/2 years I have owned my own business with a friend of mine. In a nutshell we work with an outside evaluation company and write federally competitive grants for school districts. We then write our services into the grant; professional developments, educational coaching/mentoring, and we wrote a parenting curriculum that teaches parents of pre-K students the hows and whys of literacy. Now we are merging with another company and it is so exciting. A little fact someone shared with me is that only 2% of business owners ever sell their company or are profitable enough to be merged/acquired by another company. The percentage of women owned businesses that accomplish this is even smaller! Never thought about that, but it made me feel good!

We will become the education arm of this company. We are already planning bigger and better things than we eve would have been able to do on our own. We have the manpower to do it, we have the strategic plans to accomplish the lofty goals we have set and the passion behind all of it. However, the process and change that is coming along with it all isn't easy for me. I value stability and structure. This merge/acquisition will provide me that, but in the interim it's tough.

Today I finally accepted that it is completely okay that I am having a difficult time with it and it is hard. I also realized writing it all out will help me through this process and provide the structure I need. I am being challenged to grow professionally, to learn something new and that excites me. I don't ever want to be complacent. So, with all of that said, I am going to get back to writing, processing, telling my story, sharing my kids, my family, my life. And, I want to do it on a regular basis. Tomorrow is Jeremy's day so hold on for the ride!

Happy 3rd Birthday Courtney!

2010-09-17T22:34:00.003-05:00

The Texas Move

2010-08-18T20:46:00.004-05:00

I had to post my mom's version of the big move to San Antonio. Thanks for helping Mom and Dad - we definitely couldn't have done it without you guys!

We should have known that things would not go as anticipated when the phone message from Southwest Airlines came through as Bob and I were driving across the Richmond/San Raphael bridge on our way to the Oakland airport early on July 20. The automated voice cheerfully told us that our flight from Oakland to Los Angeles had been cancelled and to call back for more information. Frantically digging through the car’s center console, I located a scrap of paper and a pen to jot down our new flight information. Southwest had put us on a later flight, making the connection time in Los Angles about 25 minutes. Luckily we arrived at the Oakland airport with time to spare and were able to make an earlier flight to Los Angeles with a longer layover there, which enabled us to make the connecting flight to San Antonio without a hitch.

Karen, Jeremy, Logan and Courtney met us at the San Antonio airport and we headed directly north to Clear Springs for dinner. Bryan and Joey met us there with Julie Allen who was presenting a volleyball camp not far from there. Bob and I had been visiting with Julie’s parents and brother at Clear Lake, California the day before! Everyone thoroughly enjoyed their meal consisting of the best onion rings, fried shrimp and sweet tea anywhere! After dinner, Bryan and Joey took Julie back to Kyle, TX and the rest of us piled in the minivan and drove back to New Braunfels. Once home, we immediately started bubble wrapping and packing, still not sure exactly when escrow would close and the keys to the new house would be available.

Wednesday, July 21 escrow finally closes! We spent the entire day packing as the movers were scheduled to call the next day between 11:30 and 1:00 to let us know when they could come to load up. Bryan picked up his cousin Jamie, at the San Antonio airport at 11:30 that night. She was coming for an extended weekend to attend a conference with Karen’s company in San Antonio.

Thursday, July 22 the movers called around 9:30 AM to say they were on their way! Needless to say, we were not ready for them as we thought we had more time and still did not have the keys to the new house. Bryan and Bob filled the minivan and pickup with miscellaneous stuff from the garage and headed to San Antonio. On the way they learned the keys were available.

Jamie went with Stacey for Education Alliance training and Karen, armed with cleaning supplies drove to the new house to frantically clean the kitchen before the movers arrived. That left Joey, all three kids and me at the house to finish packing and direct the movers. Once the movers arrived and looked at all the furniture and boxes they said they would have to make two trips. It was hot, humidity was high and the kids had all their toys packed with the exception of one small box full of cars. They went outside to play and it was not long until we heard Courtney crying. Apparently she and Logan got tangled up in the swings and Courtney landed in the dirt. She was not hurt, just covered in the powdery soil.

The movers left with the first load and Joey and I held down the fort with the kids. Bryan ordered pizza for us and he and Bob returned for another load. It was sometime during the time the movers were making their second loading when Logan found the small frog by the open front door. We had to do some fast talking to persuade him not to bring the little frog inside!

Stacey dropped Jamie off late that afternoon and we boxed up the master bedroom while Joey tried to entertain three tired kids with no toys. Bob and Bryan arrived around 6:00 PM for one more load. Bryan took Joey and Jeremy while Bob and I had two exhausted little ones. They were asleep before we got out of the neighborhood!

We had Rudy’s for dinner and hauled the mattresses upstairs for the boys, Courtney, and Bob and I. We could not put any other furniture upstairs as new carpet was being installed on Monday, which was three days away. That meant almost everything was piled to the ceiling in the garage – furniture, boxes, bicycles, etc. Bryan and Bob did manage to get the new TV stand assembled and the TV hooked up in the Great Room.

Karen and Jamie did not spend that night or the next two nights at the new house as they were staying at the River Walk Marriott’s for the conference. We staggered upstairs to sleep on our mattresses on the floor to get ready for the next day. However, our rest was short lived. Logan was up at 1:30 AM sick with the 24 hour bug that Jeremy had before we arrived on Tuesday. I bathed Logan, Bryan washed bedding and Joey staggered around wondering what in the world he had signed up for! Logan was sick all night until close to 5:30 AM.

Friday, July 23 Logan was limp and tired and just wanted to be held most of the day. However, Scott, the electrician was scheduled to arrive at 9:00 AM to install six ceiling fans and repair several outlets in the kitchen. We were glad to see Scott as it was very HOT upstairs! We all started unpacking what we could. Logan was sick one last time.

That afternoon a Time-Warner cable technician came to turn on the HD service and check the Internet cables. Bryan wanted to add two more cable drops, but the worker said it was too hot to go up in the attic and to call to schedule an appointment in the morning when it was cooler.

Later that evening we walked down to the community pool to cool off and relax a little. By then Logan was feeling fine.

Saturday, July 24 we continued to unpack. Bryan and Bob made a run to the dump. We were amazed at all the trash we had accumulated in such a short time. Then we had to reshuffle all the furniture and boxes in the garage as Rachel decided to take the extra set of living room furniture – two couches, a sofa chair, and ottoman plus all the pillows. Of course all that big furniture was stacked in the back of the garage. Bryan made a run to HEB for chocolate cake and ice cream as it was my birthday. We were too tired to celebrate!

Sunday, July 25 Bryan went back to work and we continued to unpack all that we could. Karen and Jamie arrived home around 9:00 PM – just in time to snuggle Courtney, who had come down with the 24 hour bug and had thrown up earlier. Naturally, she only wanted her mom. Courtney and Karen were up all night.

Monday, July 26 the Lowe’s carpet installers arrived around 9:00 AM and began working upstairs. Bob and Joey were hit with the 24 hour bug and were down for the count. Once Bryan got home he and I began unloading the garage and carrying all the bedroom furniture for the boys room, Courtney’s room and Joey’s room upstairs. Karen had to work and Jamie went to the airport for her flight back home, so it was mostly Bryan and I. Later Bryan admitted that he did not feel 100% that day either!

Tuesday, July 27 the roofing insulation team arrived in the morning to blow in insulation in the attic, located in the boy’s room. We placed flattened boxes where we could so the workers would not track dirt and insulation on the new carpet. Thankfully, no damage was done! We decided to take a break and walked to the swimming pool for a dip.

Wednesday, July 28 Bryan went back to work in Austin and the cleaning lady, Daney, arrived at 10:00 AM. Karen had a long list of things for her to work on. She wasn’t there long, when the Time-Warner technician arrived to install the two additional cable connections in the front playroom or Wii Room, as Joey called it, and in Joey’s bedroom upstairs. The technician was supposed to go up in the attic, but as he was 6’8” and the attic floor was hard to see with all the insulation that was blown in the day before, he decided it would be best to run the cable around the outside of the house and then inside. He was in and out, up on a ladder and working hard. In a little while another technician showed up to help him. Karen went outside to deal with the next door neighbor who was unhappy that the cleaning lady’s car was partially in her driveway when she noticed the first technician sitting on the porch sweating profusely. It was hot, but not that hot. Karen asked him if he felt all right and if he would like to come inside for a drink of water and to cool off. He decided to come in, saying he felt a little dizzy. He continued to sweat buckets. His clothes were drenched in sweat. By then the other technician was inside as well and we all decided it was time to call 911. Bob and Joey had gone to Best Buy to look for some CDs and missed all the action.

A San Antonio fire engine roared up to the house, lights and siren on. After checking his vital signs, the technician decided he would have his friend drive him to the ER. When he tried to stand up, he was too dizzy so the paramedics were called and they loaded him up and off they went to the ER.

The paramedics had barely left the house when two men showed up from Lowe’s to install the new dishwasher! It didn’t take them long to move the old dishwasher out to the garage for Rachel and to install the new quiet stainless steel dishwasher.

That evening we decided to go to Chipolte for dinner, but I was hit with the 24 hour bug and remained at home. Afterwards, everyone else watched The Blind Side and ate popcorn while I remained upstairs.

Thursday, July 29 we continued to unpack. Karen and I decided to take a little break while Bob and Bryan were out shopping and Courtney was napping when Logan came running into the Great Room shouting, “There’s a flood, there’s a flood!” The downstairs toilet had overflowed! Luckily, Bryan and Bob walked in the door at that moment.

Shawn came by that afternoon to look at the hot tub and to figure out the best way to remove it and repair the damage.

We were still working our way through the garage trying to unpack all the boxes that are stacked there. That evening after dinner, Karen and I went to Target to shop for school supplies for Jeremy, Logan and Courtney.

Friday, July 30 Bryan was mowing the lawns and attacking a flowerbed in the front yard when he spotted the Rotor-Rooter truck across the street. They came over when they were finished and worked on the downstairs toilets. One toilet has bad plumbing and the other bathroom needs a toilet replaced!

Saturday, July 31 was the night Karen and I killed Sputnik, the wireless router. We were trying to set up the new wireless printer. Luckily, it was only temporary and Sputnik was up and running again by 2:00 AM.

Sunday, August 1 Bryan was back at work. We all decided to go to Mimi’s for breakfast. Karen had been there once before, so we only got a little lost. Breakfast was delicious, but that night Karen was hit with the 24 hour bug!

Monday, August 2 Karen had to work in New Braunfels. A neighbor brought over a box of cakeballs, a delicious treat. Bob and I decided to go to Clear Springs for a shrimp lunch and pick up some plastic chairs for the deck that were on sale at Target. For some unknown reason, I decided to sit on one of the plastic tables. There was a horrible screeching sound. Bob looked over and all four legs of the table were pancaked with me on top! I bounced right up, we loaded the chairs in the basket and shot out of Target. Luckily I did not break the table! We laughed all the way home.

Tuesday, August 3 Karen had to work again and we continued to move boxes from the garage. That evening Karen and I took Jeremy to the mall to the Build-A-Bear Workshop and to buy new school clothes.

Wednesday, August 4 we went to Sunshine Cottage to see the new campus. It is beautiful – a state of the art facility. Jeremy, Logan and Courtney all got to meet their teachers. Bob and I packed our suitcases and Karen took us to the airport a little early on her way to a meeting. We were delayed about 30 minutes in Denver and arrived home at 12:30 AM. I slept most of the way home!

I had to write this down as no one would believe all we went through in two short weeks!

AG Bell

2010-06-22T23:14:00.001-05:00

I am getting excited for the AG Bell conference this weekend in Orlando, FL! I get to go as a mom and for work, yahoo!!

Any suggestions, anyone out there in the blog world attending?

Swimming

2010-06-15T21:45:00.003-05:00

Since we found out about Courtney one of the things, among many, is how she could swim. I know how kids swim and learn how to swim, but how would we teach her when her CIs were off while in the water. I haven't looked into the heavy duty swim caps she could possible wear with her CIs yet. I don't really understand them to be honest! So without "ears" on we have embarked on this humbling experience!

First, Courtney LOVES the water! She has no fear, which is scary! Since it has been so hot, a few weeks ago I took all 3 kids by myself to the YMCA. Yes, I know, I am crazy! The boys were awesome. They knew where to stay and always called out when I called to them. Courtney was a crazy girl! She would get out, run around, jump in. Over and over again! The other people in the pool were looking and thinking this girl does not behave as I kept telling her not to run, etc. Everyone was nice and once I explained they helped me try to contain her! While I was dying inside because she couldn't hear me, she was having the time of her life. She has also discovered if she takes her CIs off and doesn't look at me or if she closes her eyes then she doesn't have to obey. Oh, it was crazy! There was none of this I am embarrassed to be in a swimsuit on my part. I was leaping up, down, running through shallow water, up on the edge of the pool, etc. to ensure she didn't go under.

After about an hour I was exhausted! I put her "ears" back on and talked about everything we did in the pool. A few days later we went again to a friend's neighborhood pool. She did great! This time she wanted to wear a life jacket since Logan was. We stayed in the kitty pool and she go the hang of getting her feet under her, hollering for help when she needed it, etc. After 3 hours we were done and I have to admit I was glad to put her "ears" back on to talk about our day and hear her voice again. She talks a little without the CIs on, but nothing like when they are on.

I am working on an experience book to give her the language for all of the things we do and see while at the pool. Especially no running or jumping in without an adult!! I am glad we finally "dove" into swimming! You can't live in Texas and not get in the water!

Guitar Lessons

2010-04-07T20:04:00.004-05:00

Tomorrow will mark Jeremy's second guitar lesson, but I didn't want his first one to go by without blogging about it. He was so excited! Bryan went into a local music shop and spoke to them about Jeremy wanting to take lessons. Bryan ended up signing him up for 1 month and came home with a guitar, picks and case. All of the kids wanted to play it. The guy told Bryan Jeremy is a little young, but to try it out and see.

So, off they went last week. I met Bryan and the boys and took Logan and Courtney so Bryan and Jeremy could go to their first lesson. I was glad because I was nervous for some reason. We all met up for dinner at one of our favorite restaurants and I got the scoop. His teacher told Bryan that he is very bright and seems to catch on very quickly and was really surprised due to his age (6). They had their lesson and his teacher assigned him an actual song. He told us to just "see" what happens. Don't force anything, just see if he wants to practice, if he likes it, and if he "catches" on. The teacher told us that he told Jeremy he was smart, his reply was, "I know and funny, too." Needless to say we had a mini lesson on what to do when someone gives you a compliment, you simply say thank you. However, we did think it was funny!

That night he came home and taught me everything he learned. I can honestly say I am not cut out for the guitar. I can't even get my fingers to work on a youth guitar!! Jeremy wants to sing while he plays, but hasn't mastered that just yet. He can, however, play Hot Cross Buns! It is just too stinkin' cute! He absolutely loves it and I am anxious to see what happens tomorrow!

Blood Work Results

2010-03-30T21:56:00.003-05:00

After a horrible reaction to the super strong doses of antibiotics, Bryan and I decided to take Courtney off of them and call the doctor Monday. She was so sick. We just couldn't fathom giving her more when all of the blood work had been done and she may not even need the antibiotics. The infectious disease doctor is only in the office on Tuesdays, the rest of the time she works out of a hospital. Anyways, I called Monday and she happened to have a cancellation for today. Relief!

The blood work was in and things look good. Her immune system is good and intact. Her titers, however, showed lower than she would like. She said that they weren't "stellar". Basically, her body has a difficult time making antibodies to fight off some strains of the strep bacteria. So, the Pneumovax that she just had last week and the new Prevnar 13 she will need to take in a few weeks will help build those numbers. She will re-check her blood levels one month after she has the Prevnar vaccination. The culture of the drainage this time came out to be viral, not an infection. (This means we do not have to continue the two antibiotics that caused her to be so sick! Yahoo!) She feels that the drainage is part of Courtney's vicious cycle. Her eustachian tube doesn't function correctly which is why she has tubes so her ear will drain. In a non-implanted person this would not be an issue. Since there is a foreign object in her ear any drainage poses a threat. The hope is as she continues to grow her eustachian tube will develop and work correctly and will "grow out" of ear infections.

Of course, Courtney had drainage today and since she has had so many infections she is putting her in a prophylaxis for 6 months. In the meantime if we have any questions or continue to have ear infections to go back and see her. She is great!! I am keeping my fingers crossed that we can boost her immune system and that in 6 months we can stop all medications and be healthy!!! All her allergy testing came back negative except for cats!! Yep, she is allergic to cats! Thank goodness we don't have any pets, unless you count a fish!?

Plan of Action

2010-03-23T20:46:00.004-05:00

After my last discouraging doctor's appointment, etc. I decided our best approach was to take action and make an appointment with an infectious disease doctor. In fact, the doctor we ended up seeing was a pediatric infectious disease doctor! Even better!

Two weeks ago this Thursday Courtney finished a 10 day round of augmentin and one week's worth of antibiotic drops. I was starting to either worry or hope, I am not sure which one, that her ear was going to be all cleared up and we weren't going to have any more problems. This would be good if it were really the end, but bad since we had the appointment scheduled with the doctor for today. Did the antibiotics really work? If it wasn't draining yet, would the doctor still take it seriously and move forward with an action plan? I just wanted a concrete plan.

I think with a little divine intervention, Courtney woke up this morning with drainage. I know this seems terrible that I wanted her to have drainage. It is kind of like that squeak in your car that you want fixed, but whenever you take your car in it doesn't do it! You want it to squeak, I wanted it to drain! And it did! So here is the plan!

We had blood work done today which wasn't easy, but she did it. Thankfully we did at Methodist Children's so they had tiny needles, yet it still took a stick in each arm to get enough blood for today. She has to go back again to do the rest because they are only allowed to take a certain amount of blood in one day. The bottom line is the doctor wants to check her immune system more thoroughly, boost it and find out why she can't clear up the infection completely.

To start off we are on two types of antibiotics for 14 days versus the normal 10. She is on a stronger dose of augmentin and rifampin. She did warn me, thank goodness, that rifampin will cause her tears, urine, snot, etc. to be orange so don't freak out! She is leaving drops to Dr. Not so Happy to prescribe tomorrow at our follow up from the ear infection that is already back! We will go back to her in two weeks to get all of our results and determine our next steps based on the results, etc.

In the meantime she ordered a regular ol' CBC which will basically measure the concentration of red blood cells, white blood cells and platelets in the blood. She also ordered autoimmune deficiency testing for subclasses Ig C, Ig E, Ig M, Ig I, Ig G, and Ig A. In addition to that she did the pneumococcal titers (14 serotypes). This will determine if Courtney fails to make an antibody response to any of the 14 serotypes. One of the tests we have to still do is the allergy RAST test which will determine if the drainage is allergy related and the infection is really a secondary infection. Apparently this test alone takes up the one day allotment that can be taken from Sassy Pants. After the blood draw, she got a dose of the pneumovax! The thought behind this was to boost her immune system and cover more types of pneumococcus. And last, but not least she ordered a streptococcus pneumoniae urine test. From my understanding this will test if streptococcus pneumoniae is in her urine, but I don't know at this point, why that is important! This by the way, has to be done on a non potty trained little girl and taken to San Antonio on ice within 4 hours after she goes. Okay Heavenly Father, a little more divine intervention might be needed here!! Timing this between the commute to school, work, doctors appointments and a non cooperative 2 year old should be interesting!!!

The only other thing she would like to do is to have her vaccinated with the newly FDA approved Prevnar 13. This was just approved February 24, 2010 and will cover 13 strains of bacteria versus the 7. Because Courtney had the other vaccine today she wants to wait for one month.

Okay, that was more medical talk than I know what to do with!! I feel really good about this plan and really good about this doctor! She wants a handle on this, wants to know why she continues to have these ear infections AND she has a plan!! I will keep you all posted!

Reaching Out

2010-03-03T19:29:00.003-06:00

I haven't been the best blogger, and I don't know who all reads this, but I need help. This is our situation.

Courtney has chronic ear infections with drainage. We do countless rounds of oral antibiotics, and I think we have gone through at least a half dozen bottles of antibiotic drops. It will clear up and then within a few weeks to a month, at the most, it will begin draining again. It is always the right ear, we are on our second set of PE tubes and have done an adenoidectomy. We have ruled out a biofilm and an infected implant due to two cultures a year apart, but both came back with the pneumococcal bacteria.

This past week we went back to Dr.Not so Happy with Him Right Now and found out the recent culture showed pneumococcal bacteria. He prescribed oral antibiotics and drops and sent us back to our pediatrician - what? You are the ear doctor!! He said that he was not okay with the situation, but since the implant wasn't infected we needed to go to the pedi to explore blood work for an immune deficiency and possible discuss seeing an infectious disease doctor. So, I am at an ear "expert" and you are sending me to my pedi with a chronic ear infection!?

I was able to get in yesterday with our pedi, he was great, but obviously isn't familiar with everything with cochlear implants, etc. We did the blood work which came back normal and he said there isn't anything more he can do. What? What the heck am I supposed to do now!? I called our pedi ENT office for a 2nd opinion or something, but can't get in until April 26th!

Has anyone experienced chronic ear infections like this? There normally isn't fever, but always drainage with or without odor and turns tan or yellow or greenish. Should we try to get into an infectious disease doctor? Is it okay to just keep doing oral antibiotics and drops?

Any advice would be great!

Quick Update

2010-02-28T22:17:00.002-06:00

We ended up doing a culture on Courtney's right ear. We find out tomorrow what it is and how we will treat it. The options are more oral antibiotics, going to an infectious disease doctor, removing the tube they just put in, patching her eardrum and doing more antibiotics, or iv antibiotics. So, we shall see!

On another note Jeremy has decided not to play baseball. He was all signed up, but hadn't started yet. Bryan and the boys went down to the mission by our house (big lawn area) to play ball. Logan can't get enough baseball and would sleep in his baseball pants if he could! They were playing and then somehow Bryan and Jeremy started talking. Bryan asked him if he really wanted to play. Apparently Jeremy hesitated and then told Bryan that he really didn't want to. Bryan told him it was okay and that he just needed to tell him, etc. So, Bryan came home feeling bad, not so much because Jeremy didn't want to play (he was a little bummed about it) but because Jeremy thought Bryan would be disappointed!

Oh, my heart went out to both of them. Late last night the little ones went to bed so Jeremy and I had ice cream cones and Bryan sat at the table with us. Jeremy is really into music and loves to sing, etc. He asked if he could take guitar lessons. Bryan told him at the table he could and we discussed practicing and the responsibility, etc. He was and is truly excited about taking lessons, he lit up. Never did so much about baseball.

As for Logan - he is great! It is never a dull moment with him! Our house has been on the market so the other day we had a showing. Jeremy wasn't too happy about it as he doesn't want to move. I went on to explain that the Lord is in charge and we will move in His time, etc. So the next morning after breakfast Logan asks me, "Mommy, when is Jesus going to sell our house." It still makes me chuckle!!

And last, but certainly not least, Bryan has started taking, drum roll please...................................... bagpipe lessons!!! Yep, my hotty, fireman hubby is going to be wearing a skirt, I mean kilt!!! It is for the fire department and he is getting better every day, but this too, makes me chuckle!! Love ya babe!

Thief!

2010-02-10T22:36:00.005-06:00

Yep, I am a thief! I stole this video from this blog that I follow. It was such a good, quick explanation of how the cochlear implant works, I thought I had to have it! Thank you Lone Star Family!!

Late Catch Up

2010-02-08T21:09:00.004-06:00

A week has already passed since my baby boy turned 4! Logan James is now, "A different person," according to him! We had a joint birthday party with a friend from Jeremy's class at Sunshine Cottage (pictures to come). All he wanted was cake and balloons, but he also got a rented jump castle, friends, pizza and presents! He was so cute. Logan is our funny guy, all middle child! He has a twinkle in his eyes and such a love bug! When he is really buttering you up, he, "Gets some sugar!" Oh, we just love him so much!

This past Saturday he had a T-ball clinic. He was so excited. Bryan took him the day before to Academy for baseball pants and socks. He woke up a little after 6am Saturday asking if he could put on his new baseball pants and if it was time to go to his game yet! He also got a new bat a few weeks prior, but it was on timeout since Logan hit Courtney in the face with it and gave her a black eye! Anywho, he loves baseball and can't wait for Saturday to come again to go to his "game".

On another note, Courtney is in a big girl bed! Her crib turns into a toddler bed and since Logan and Courtney are so close in age, we never used it that way before!! I am a believer of keeping kids in cribs as long as you can. Well, the time came! I heard a blood curdling scream and found her face down on the ground. Yep, she tried to climb out. I knew it was coming, but the boys would just monkey their way down, not Courtney! So far it hasn't been too bad. However, it is difficult trying to tell a deaf girl to get back in bed. It's kind of interesting!! I am seeing that she can read lips. I told her after laying with her for a while, "Okay, Courtney it is time to go night night." She said, "Okay, night night." People told me she would do this and in the middle of the night if she woke up sick or whatever that we would be able to carry on a "normal" conversation, but it was hard to believe. It's actually kind of amazing!!

The flip side of Courtney is that she is battling an ear infection even after removing those adenoids and 2nd set of tubes. So, we are on a high dose of antibiotic ear drops and a wick in her ear to keep the drops in. We go back on Thursday to take the wick out. Then we wait 72 hours. If there is any drainage at all we have to do a culture. Depending on what the culture comes back with, if we have to do it, we will either do IV antibiotics or re-do the tube. This isn't the first time we have done a wick and a culture so we shall see!! I'm just really hoping for no drainage after Thursday!!

Jeremy is doing great in school and just went to a baseball clinic on Saturday as well. He loved it and did great! He also gave his first talk in church on Sunday. Oh y goodness it warmed my heart! He did so good! He was so nervous, but didn't need any help. We practiced reading it and then he skyped with his grandparents in CA and practiced for them the night before On Sunday he was so scared he just couldn't look up at anyone! He has such a sweet spirit! It worked out for Bryan to be there as well to see his first talk, yahoo!

Well, that is about it for now! I am really trying to post more regularly, but it is hard!! More pictures to come soon!

We survived!

2010-01-22T20:32:00.004-06:00

W did survive, but it was a challenge!! When we arrived this morning Dr. Syms informed me with Courtney's history of ear infections that we should go ahead and remove her adenoids! A little longer of a procedure and a whole lot more anesthesia and all that comes along with that, but we survived! We felt it best to do it while she was under rather than schedule another procedure.

Courtney is soundly, safely sleeping in bed! Glad it is over and that Bryan is home! Note to self, never schedule a 10 minute procedure of any kind unless both parents can attend! You never know what the doctor may want to do!!!

Frazzled, but survived!

2010-01-21T22:31:00.004-06:00

If you know me and I mention that I am going to take all 3 of my children to a 3 hour doctor's appointment (yes, I knew it would be 2.5 to 3 hours BEFORE I went) please try to talk me out of it. Especially if I mention that all 3 of them will be getting up at 6am and Courtney won't be able to take a nap.

Yep, I took them all to a have their eyes checked. Logan had a follow up and Courtney and Jeremy needed to be examined. The staff and doctors were great and very patient with us. It was the worst Courtney has ever behaved. Ear piercing screams at the top of her lungs, running and slamming the exam room door, and collapsing on the ground are just a few of the tricks she used. I sat with her, I talked, I distracted, I fed her, I tried everything, but nothing worked. Logan would look at her wrong and she would yell, "Owe!" What? Logan didn't even touch her!! The nurses would come in with they toys that they kept for, "These kinds of situations."

Then, little Miss Sassy Pants, gets up in the exam chair and is a perfect angel for the doctor. Great! We are out of the woods! Nope, she gets down runs out the door, runs back in and hits Logan. The doctor reassures me it is okay, he has a 2 year old. I am dying, frazzled by this point. Courtney proceeds to push Logan so the doctor gets down eye level with Courtney and tells her hitting is not allowed in his office (all very kind) and that if she does it again she won't be able to go to the prize box. She knew she was in trouble so she starts to scream.

At this point the doctor hadn't discussed with me Logan's results from his October surgery, if it took, etc. Jeremy and Courtney were good to go. The screaming continues every time we try to talk so the nurse takes all of the kids to get prizes so we can talk. I wanted to shut the door and lock it for just a minute. They all picked out a prize or two and we wonder why Courtney is persistent. She always gets what she wants!!

The kids almost all got a good report. Courtney has to come back in a year (can't wait), but doesn't need glasses or have any signs of crossing, etc. Neither does Jeremy, yahoo! Logan is good for now, but his measurements from his last appointment to this one have gotten worse as far as crossing. His vision is great, but we are in a "tweener" stage according to the doctor. We don't have to do anything now, but in 4 months if it gets any worse we may have to do another surgery.

So, in the end I survived , frazzled, but alive! I called Bryan who is in Utah until tomorrow night to give him a full report and let him know that Courtney's neurotologist called to schedule another set of tubes for tomorrow morning. He offered to come home early, but I figured if I can survive 3 of them at the doctor, I can survive a 10 minute procedure even if it does require general anesthesia!

Candids

2010-01-19T21:15:00.008-06:00

I am horrible with a camera and trying to remember to grab the camera, but not my mom! Whenever she comes she always gets the best shots! I have included a sample of a few of my favorites. I love these little guys so much and am so thankful for my family. Their love for not only Bryan and I, but for each other is beautiful, innocent and so pure. Thank you Jeremy, Logan and Courtney for bringing us a lot of love (and chaos)! I can't imagine it any other way!

Thank you to a tooth

2010-01-06T19:59:00.004-06:00

Dear Tooth,

I just wanted to thank you so much for joining our group of friends. The two kids downstairs were getting lonely because no one else seemed to be showing up! If you could encourage your other friends that have been hiding underground with you to come up for some sunshine that would be wonderful. We have been trying for some time to eat popcorn, meat and expand our taste buds, but it just gets difficult, if not depressing doing it alone.

I am on the welcoming committee and we need more individuals like yourself to join us. Courtney provides us with a great place to live and grow. We are just thrilled that you are here. Again, I just wanted to extend my gratitude for arriving. It is better late than never! I hope you grow to be nice, pretty and strong. See you around.

Love,
Your new friend, Molar. (I am the one upstairs in the far back right corner!)

Holiday Pictures

2010-01-03T16:33:00.003-06:00

We took so many pictures over the holidays that I thought it would be best to just put in separate slideshows of the highlights. Not all of my pictures are downloaded yet, but it's a start!

The first one is baking Christmas cookies!

Sunshine Cottage Party

2010-01-03T16:15:00.003-06:00

The last day before Christmas break Logan's teacher invited us for a holiday party. The kids are doing amazing in Logan's class. It is hard to believe at the beginning of the year most of them were non-verbal and now they are talking in complete sentences! It is so exciting to see a preview of what is to come for Courtney! We had a great time and Logan's teacher, Ms. Judy, gave all of the kids a Beta fish for Christmas. So we have our first pet, Pluto, a.k.a. Sushi!

Christmas 2009

2010-01-03T14:35:00.012-06:00

Christmas Eve my mom took a bunch of pictures of the kids by the tree, etc. Christmas morning Santa came and brought lots of goodies for the kids. When Bryan was off shift we then opened all of the presents under the tree. It was amazing because the kids never asked one time while waiting for Bryan to open any of the presents under the tree. It was so great to have my parents in town. It was just a really good Christmas!!

2010

2010-01-01T21:17:00.009-06:00

To start off the year I couldn't pass up posting a picture that tells it all!! Every year my Mom takes out family picture. It always seems to be last minute so we are rushing around between naps, meals, entertaining and weather! We almost didn't do them this year since I hadn't even framed last year's until two days ago, but we went for it anyway. It was around 4:30pm, a little later than my mom had wanted for lighting purposes and freezing! This picture cracks me up. My mom was snapping away when Jeremy decided to grab Logan's cheeks the way Jeremy is grabbing his. Apparently Jeremy grabbed a bit too hard which put Logan in tears. Bryan, couldn't understand why in the world Jeremy would decide to do this. Courtney was very concerned stating, "Oten sad." All the while I am just trying to remain calm!!!

In the end my mom got a great shot and the picture is already up and framed in our house!! That is the way to start 2010.

This last one is just a picture that I thought was sweet, especially since Courtney was so sour during all of the picture taking!! The only way we got her to look out at the camera was to ask her if she saw a non-existent horse. My dad even turned around pretending to wave to one! I am glad we won't be doing this for another year!!

"Kohler, we wouldn't expect anything less!"

2009-11-24T20:46:00.002-06:00

I had the weirdest day ever yesterday....

Bryan and I woke up to the normal sounds of the boys running down the hallway and Courtney hollering to let us know she is awake. The boys went into Courtney's room to get her out of her crib when we heard a crash. Again, nothing out of the ordinary, with three kids things are always crashing!! With Courtney sounding a little uncomfortable I got up to investigate.

I found Courtney on the ground on the side of her crib with Jeremy crouched beside her and Logan half way into the crib to jump on the bed. As I scooped up Courtney to put her "ears" on and change her I asked Jeremy if they fell over while he was getting her out. He told me, "No, she just fell into the wall." I thought yeah right and went on about my business. Courtney was still fussing which she sometimes does when I change her. As I finished changing her and sat her up on the changing table she took a nose dive into the wall. Okay that was weird.

I picked her up to console her when she started swaying back and forth. She seemed out of it. I took her into my bedroom and sat her on the bed, she fell over again. Her head was still swaying back and forth. Okay, I began to panic. Bryan immediately jumped up and went to the computer. I tried to put her down, she fell over. She had no balance what so ever. Then, she began throwing up. I was ready to take her to the ER!!

Fortunately I have a sane husband who told me it was probably all related to her ear infection that she was taking oral antibiotics for since Friday. It all sounded good in theory, but as of Friday, she had tubes in both ears, so why was her equilibrium off? I called my girlfriend who was supposed to come over to let the kids play. I told her I wasn't sure what was going on, but that we were going to call the doctor as soon as they opened.

The doctor takes about 50 minutes to get to so at 8:09 Bryan told her I could make it there by 9 as we all stood there in our pajamas. Ahhh! I made it there just a few minutes late. By the time we arrived Courtney seemed better and kept asking to get down. I tried, but she couldn't walk. She would just fall over. She would look at me with these big eyes confused as to what was going on. We quickly went back and saw the PA. He checked out her ears and confirmed that she did have an ear infection and that that could be why she is off balance, etc., but he wanted to consult with the doctor to be sure because it isn't normal.

As he stepped out the panic set in. I texted my mom freaking out. What?! Can't we just suction her ear and move on? About an hour later he comes back in and tells me that he and the doctor both think her imbalance is due to her ear infection and that she doesn't have a tube in her left ear. Somehow between Friday and Monday she had lost her tube. She was having negative pressure in her ear which may effect her balance. He changed her antibiotic to a stronger one and said that we were to come back in 10-14 days to see if she has improved. And, informed me that more than likely she would need to have another set of tubes put in. So off we went two hours later.

I called home where my friend had already arrived and another one on the way. Bryan informed me that Logan had a doctor's appointment with the dermatologist because he had a few HUGE boils on his bum. He has had this before and it was staph, so to the doctor he went. I picked up pizza for all of us on the way home. When I go there we let little girl down and she would zig and zag and crash to the ground. Now, when our kids have come off of sedation drugs we chuckled when they stumbled around like little drunks, but this made my heart hurt. She would be calling my name and just fall down. Oh, it made my heart hurt.

She slowly improved, but she was definitely tired. I put her down for a nap, tried to visit with my girlfriends and got Bryan and Logan out the door when the phone rang. The showing service wanted to know if a realtor could show our house in an hour from 3-5. Thank goodness for true friends who helped me run around and pick up my house. The day was seeming so crazy. I apologized to my friends who one of them told me, "Kohler, we don't expect anything less!" Great, a bout of some sort of vertigo and a possible staph infection seems normal for the Kohlers to my friends.

In the middle of all of this the pharmacy called and said that they or their sister companies didn't have the antibiotic in stock. After Bryan and I discussed that it isn't the first time we have had to go to Austin for a prescription (some crazy drug when Logan contracted giardia) the pharmacy calls back and said that they don't have it, but they do have the name brand for $25. What?! If you would have told me that to begin with, we would have agreed to forgo the generic and saved the headache!

I wake Courtney up to go meet Bryan and Logan to head to the outlet mall to get shoes for the kids since we had nothing else to good. Hind sight, not a good idea. What was I thinking taking a contagious staph infected boy out in public! I am one of "those" people now! Logan does have a staph infection and boils did burst which is completely disgusting, but apparently has to happen or you have to lance it off. The doctor took a culture and sent it off to rule out MRSA. What?! That can't be good!

So, all the kids got new shoes, we picked up our prescriptions and headed home. We fed and bathed the kids and bleached half the house! It was a weird day. Courtney is doing much better, but still a little off balance when she first touches ground. Logan has improved as well. Oh, the potential buyers liked the house, loved the floors, but it wasn't quite big enough for them! Maybe next time!

What I have learned...

2009-10-15T21:44:00.005-05:00

Last year at this time we were celebrating every sound Courtney could hear. Today, we are not only celebrating the sounds she hears, but the words she says. It has been an amazing journey with ups and downs, but overall good. I can't help but reflect on all of the things I have learned as I met a young mother recently who thinks her son is deaf, but is afraid to tell anyone. She heard Courtney talk over the phone and I couldn't help but feel emotional, not sad, just emotional. Most things I already knew, but were simply confirmed this past year.

I have learned that as a parent we will sacrifice everything for their well being, for them to be successful. I have met families who have moved to another country to get the best care/therapy they could find. We are only trying to move to another city and it is difficult, I can't imagine another country!

I have learned that for everything in life there is a season and every person chooses what that season is. For me, I am a mom, a wife and a business owner. I can't be the best athlete, I can be in shape, but running a marathon will have to wait. I want to go back to school for my doctorate, but that too will have to wait. It is not my season. However, I love the season I am in.

I get to drop off and pick up my kids from school, not everyone can do that. I get to keep Courtney at home most of the time. I have a flexible enough schedule that I can make a doctor appointment, dentist appointment, or schedule surgery for myself or my kids any time or day of the week. With that comes sacrifices I am willing to make because I can't do it all. If I say yes to something I am saying no to something else, and that is okay.

I have learned that in a marriage the feelings love turn into actions of love. Filling up my car with gas, loading my car before a business trip at 6:15am, getting the boys ready and taking them to school at 6:45am every morning he is home so I can work out in the morning, and the list goes one. It is truly the little things.

I have learned that I couldn't be the mom, wife and friend I am today if it weren't for my parents. As I dive deeper into parenthood I understand the importance of being a good role model. I am so thankful for their continuous support through all of our trials and tribulations. They have taught me there is always a solution, never quit, work hard, be fair, be kind, to name a few. Thank you.

Most importantly I have learned what unwavering faith is. It is not something that comes easy, but is the biggest blessing to actually exercise it and leave every worry, sorrow, hurt and pain to Him. Sometimes we get the confirmation that everything will be okay. I now know that okay may not be the answer we want (i.e. I wanted Courtney to be able to hear - that would have made me okay). Well, Courtney is deaf and I am okay. Life is difficult, but I know in the end I will be okay.

As I reflect, I feel humbled at the many blessings I have been given. God is good, life is good!

Comal County Fair

2009-09-27T16:39:00.006-05:00

Yesterday we went to the annual Comal County Fair. Yesterday also marked the one year anniversary of Courtney's cochlear implant surgery! My mom and I are in debate over if the surgery date or the activation date is her hearing birthday. I am going to go with the activation date so I will wait to write more on her progress until then!

The kids had a blast and it was amazing to see Courtney take in all the fair excitement! Logan loved the kiddy rides and Jeremy... Well, Jeremy scared his mother to death. He decided he wanted to ride a big kid ride. The Super Shoot. This is the one that goes straight up in the air and then just falls down. I was a nervous wreck. He is only 6!!!! Bryan quickly told me that just because I don't like rides doesn't mean I have to hold him back. Hold him back??? He is only 6! Jeremy did it not once, but twice, and we could have won big on America's Funniest Videos for his facial expression as the ride came crashing down. I couldn't watch the first time, but I did the second and it was hilarious!

The boys loved petting the baby animals, but Courtney wasn't so sure. She didn't even want to touch the baby chicks! She kept saying no and bye-bye to the animals. We have gone every year and felt a little sad knowing that it might be our last as New Braunfels residents! (Hopefully!!) Here are a few pictures of the night.

Happy 2nd Birthday Courtney!

2009-09-17T18:10:00.002-05:00

Dear Courtney,

I can't believe today is your 2nd birthday already! You have brought us so much joy and on a journey we have learned to embrace. Your sweet spirit and laughter are infectious! I love seeing you interact with your brothers. Through all of the roughness you hold your own. You are a strong willed little girl which can be very difficult now, but later in life will be one of your greatest attributes. "Sassy Pants" is sometimes an understatement!

This last year has been an amazing ride, watching your world open up to sound. You still seem to take so much in visually. I love to watch you and look at your eyes as you take in the sights and sounds around you. You are social and love to blow kisses to everyone, including airplanes, buses and semi trucks! Our family wouldn't be complete without you and we thank our Heavenly Father for you every day!

I look forward to your growth and development this next year. It is hard to envision as we never thought you would dance when you heard music, turn to your name, or light up as we sang Happy Birthday to you. Thank you for choosing us, we love you!

Love you!
Mommy (Moaney)

Re-Cap

2009-09-12T17:48:00.014-05:00

I had to post this picture of Courtney in honor of my friend Lisa! She is working so hard to feed her children nothing but nutritious food. She posts excellent healthy recipes, and my kids stuff their faces with sugar loaded cupcakes! Needless to say, I have a lot to learn from her!

Things for the moment have slowed down so I thought I would post some pictures and do a re-cap on life at the Kohlers. After our trip to CA this summer we had to come home and decide where we were going to put Logan for pre-school. Bryan and I both felt that Logan needed something more than daycare and needed a true pre-school. Before we left I had discussed with the director of the Parent Infant Program at Sunshine Cottage, Logan enrolling there but there wasn't a spot. However, when we returned they had made a new class so there was a spot for him. We were thrilled. At the same time they mentioned there was still openings for 1st grade. I ended up going home with two enrollment packets and a lot to discuss with Bryan!

In the end we felt it was best to send the boys there. Courtney will start there next year and go there through 5th grade. It seemed a little crazy to have Logan at one place, Jeremy at one place and Courtney at another. If money grew on trees, we would be able pick everyone up when they got out of school if we paid for after school care. At an extra $200 and something PER child it just wasn't going to work to have them at 3 separate places. So, August 11th they started school.

They are loving it! Logan is in a class with 4 other children, Ms. Judy his teacher and Ms. Amanda the instructional assistant! So far they have baked cookies, made pizzas, done all kinds of craft projects and has named himself "Logan 3". The audiologist that works in his class is named Logan, but she is a girl. My Logan can't get over that a girl can be named Logan, too. His teachers enjoy him and some of the things he says. For example, he was laying down for nap and asked his teacher about the clock. She explained that it was a clock and that it tells time. He asked if it ever stops. She told him that time doesn't really ever stop and that the clock may stop if it needed new batteries. He chewed on that for a few minutes and then said, "Man, those two skinny dudes (the minute and hour hands) never stop."

Jeremy is doing great and loves his other 7 classmates, Ms. Browning his teacher, and Mrs. Rodriguez the instructional assistant. He seems to like all of the subjects and loves to read. He talks the most about science. They take a lot of field trips at Sunshine Cottage and he is really looking forward to those!!

Courtney still goes once per week and her annual evaluation showed that she is functioning in the 15-18 month range. However, she has mastered many of the skills in the 18-24 month range. According to all of the assessments we did, she knows over 200 words and can say around 50. Her latest audiogram shosw that she can hear at 30db across all frequencies and 20db for some speech sounds. The goal is to be between 25 and 35db so she is right where she needs to be for now. It is just so exciting to see her growth and development!

With all of that good there is a little craziness. Sunshine Cottage is 35 miles away from New Braunfels. Which doesn't sound too bad except we do the roundtrip twice per day for a grand total of 700 miles per week. The trip in the morning takes a minimum of an hour one way because we are heading into San Antonio. So, we have put our house on the market to see if we can sell it and move a little closer to San Antonio. We have shown our house a few times, but no bites yet. We are keeping our fingers crossed!

During the middle of it all, Courtney and I flew to Utah to visit my good friend Missy. She recently had a baby and I just had to meet him and her daughter, Ashlyn, who is a month younger than Courtney. We had a great time!

Aslyn and Courtney

Me and Missy

Parker, Courtny and Ashlyn

Thank you Mike and Missy! Hopefully we will all be out this winter!

Bryan celebrated his 31st birthday yesterday! We didn't do anything big, just had dinner at home and yummy cupcakes for dessert! The boys really wanted to get him a work watch, so we picked one out at Academy. They were too cute about it. We started a new family tradition, inspired by another Kohler family. It's called the Birthday Box. We cut out all kinds of shapes from construction paper. I asked the kids why they loved Daddy and put one reason on each piece of paper. I added mine as well and a few from Courtney. A few highlights were: Logan - "I love Daddy because he lets us pick out the carts." (the cool car cart at the grocery store that I never get because I can't maneuver it!) Jeremy - " I love Daddy because he loves us all." Courtney - "I love Daddy because he blow dries my hair." (Bryan really does this after he gives her a bath - I love it!)

All in all life is good at the Kohlers! Hopefully I will do better at updating rather than waiting 2 months!

Happy 6th Birthday Jeremy!

2009-07-07T22:42:00.005-05:00

Dear Jeremy,

I can't believe you are 6 today. You are growing up so fast! You are turning into such a polite young boy. Daddy and I can't thank you enough for all of your help with Logan and Courtney. You are kind, loving, and tender hearted. We miss you very much, but know you are having so much fun in California with your grandparents.

Over the past year you started school and are reading above grade level. You have a love of learning and your mind never stops, or your mouth for that matter! You started racing BMX bikes with Daddy and are doing quite well with it. It was also your first year for soccer and T-Ball. When the "little ones" are napping you always whip out the crayons and color pages upon pages. And, for some reason, you love to sing and can actually carry a tune!! You love to go to church and say the most heart felt prayers. We are so thankful we have you as part of our family. You are strong, determined and a great role model for your little brother and sister.

Thank you so much for the best 6 years! We can't wait for the next 6 and many more to come.

Love,
Mommy

Hey buddy!!!! I want to wish you a happy 6th birthday. You are growing up so fast. I'm very proud of the little man you are becoming. I'm so proud of how polite and thoughtful you are. We'll race bikes more when you get back to Texas. I love you Jeremy!!! -Dad

One Year

2009-06-26T01:38:00.006-05:00

A year ago today we began Courtney's journey into the hearing world. We have come a long way since this day last year!

This morning Logan ended up in my bed and Courtney was in the pack and play in my room as well. As soon as she spotted me she hopped up and yelled, "MOM!" I love it! Thank you Courtney!

"Bobpa" and "Daddy"

2009-06-24T01:26:00.003-05:00

This Father's Day the kids and I were able to spend the day with my dad. We went to I Hop for breakfast, Dad's favorite, and just enjoyed hanging out at home. Unfortunately, Bryan was, and still is in Texas. The kids really miss him, especially Logan. We will celebrate Bryan next week when he joins us in CA.

I think the best gift that any of us could give Bryan and my dad came from Courtney... Almost one year ago to the day we never thought that hearing her say "Bobpa" clear as day to my dad and "Daddy" clear as day to Bryan would mean so much.

And, that little stinker says, "Momo" for my mom, and "Gigi" for Bryan's grandma and a whole lot of nothing for Mommy!!! What the heck is all that about?! Soon enough, I know!

End of Year

2009-05-31T10:45:00.003-05:00

I can't believe that Jeremy has already completed kindergarten! He had a great year and learned a lot. He is reading above grade level and is excited about first grade. For the end of the year they had a little graduation and awards ceremony. I wasn't able to make it to the awards ceremony, but I did make it to the graduation. They were all pretty cute!

Jeremy also finished up T-Ball. He enjoyed it, but likes racing his BMX more. He and Bryan raced last night with Bryan taking 2nd in his age group and Jeremy 3rd! I think it is great that they can share that together. Logan can't wait until he is big enough to join them. We tried to all go as a family, but Courtney and Logan were under the weather so maybe next time!

1.5 Miles

2009-05-21T21:12:00.003-05:00

The best news of the day is that after not running for months, I was able to run 1.5 miles in my hilly neighborhood without dying! I think if I was on flat ground I truly could have done 2-2.5, but I might be completely full of it and just tyring to make myself feel good! Either way, I am so glad I did it! I kept in mind my good friend who has 8 month old twins and already built up to 8+ miles. What is my excuse? Great motivation - thank you Lisa!

On the not so good, but okay news, our PHENOMENAL audiologist is retiring. What? The wonderful ones are supposed to work forever!! We both cried today! She is looking forward to spending time with her husband and her grand babies. I can't fault her there and hope she truly enjoys her retirement.

And, last, but not least on the not so good, but okay news, Logan has to have eye surgery again! We patch for 6 weeks and then go back on July 16th to see if that resolved the issue. However, the doctor thinks we will still have to re-do the surgery. At his follow up today the doctor was hoping to have more of an improvement. Bummer! We are hoping that we will be able to schedule it when Momo and Bobpa are here at the end of July to help out with kiddo logistics.

Okay

2009-05-13T23:11:00.003-05:00

Okay, so I am feeling a bit emotional! The good news is we met with the geneticist yesterday and Courtney does not appear to have any type of syndrome. She is growing and progressing normally and we just need to continue working on her speech and listening skills. There is one genetic test we can do which is for a mutation in the Connexin 30 gene. More than likely we will do this blood test to see if that is the cause of her hearing impairment. Other than that we are thankful that she is a healthy beautiful little girl!

There really isn't any bad news other than this overwhelming feeling of mommy guilt I hold. Most of the time I feel like Courtney is doing great, but then I wonder if she would say more than her few words if I worked with her more. I get all crazy in my head with so many strategies that maybe I am not focusing enough on the correct ones? We narrate everything, I am sure I could read more, I haven't pulled out the animals in a while, but we do work on, up, down, open, close, on, off ALL of the time, and of course the Ling sounds. She can hear things that I never thought she would, but then she doesn't reflect that in the sound booth?!

Am I not working with her enough? It seems on the days I am supposed to work with her (Tuesdays and Thursdays) they become errand and appointment days and we really don't get any good quiet time in. Oh I feel torn. I know deep down she is doing well, but I would be lying if I said I didn't get a small pang inside when I see other hearing children her age and she is behind. Even her stinkin' teeth are behind! Almost 20 months and only one tooth!

Okay....... I am okay, I just needed to get it out.

Hawaii

2009-05-10T21:03:00.005-05:00

Bryan and I had a wonderful time in Hawaii once we finally got there! Due to bad weather in Dallas we were delayed in San Antonio which caused us to miss our connecting flight in Dallas to Honolulu. Once we arrived in Dallas we ran through the airport and jumped on another flight to Las Angeles. From there we had a two hour layover and then made it to Honolulu and to the resort around 10:30pm 3:30am Texas time. We were tired, but glad to finally be there!

Little did we know while we were busy flying around the country, our sweet little Jeremy was mooning his classmates! Yes, I said mooning!! I have a mooner! As Bryan and I are out on our fist adventure to Pearl Harbor I decide to check my voice mail. Jeremy's teacher called saying that there was an "incident". Apparently a few boys thought it would be funny to play "Ennie, Meannie, Minnie, Moe.." and the one who was chosen was to pull their pants down and show their booty. Later I found out that he wasn't the only mooner and I have to admit, it made me feel a little better!

Late that same day I received a text saying that Jeremy got his knee stuck in the bleachers at gymnastics with Miss Stacy. It only took 20 minutes, 5 people and a bar of soap to get it out, but they did and he was fine. When we first got the text Bryan was worried that they had to call the fire department, they didn't, but we had to laugh. To round out the night we got a call from Stacy that the swine flu had hit our county and school was cancelled for two weeks. Oh my gosh!! So much for childcare logistics - all out the window. Thankfully, Stacy took it all in stride and the kids had a blast until Momo and Judy arrived!

For the rest of the week I was worried to check my phone! Bryan and I loved the resort! We toured around went to Pearl Harbor, Ford Island, Waikiki Beach (didn't like it), the North Shore (loved it), the temple, Polynesian Cultural Center, and much more. It was so nice to get away and reconnect. We are already planning a trip back Thanksgiving 2010 with my parents and the kids.

Momo, Judy and I had a great time once we did get home. They stayed for a few more days and it was wonderful. We had a lot of laughs! Thanks again Momo, Judy and Stacy for watching the kids - we can't thank you enough!

Here are a few pics from our trip and a few of the kids while we were gone!

Just Another Day at T-Ball

2009-04-22T20:47:00.003-05:00

Things are moving along nicely here at the Kohler house - thank goodness because Mommy and Daddy are off to Hawaii for a week on Monday!! Yahoo!! It is a bit of a logistical nightmare coordinating the kids with friends, but fortunately Stacy, Momo and Miss Judy are jumping in! Thank you! I am anxious to see how the week goes while we are gone - especially after today.

While at Jeremy's Tball practice, Logan (potty training) decided to take his pants off at the playground and tee tee! From a distance it looked like he was peeing on a little girl! Another mom hollers at me to look and the mother of the little girl and I run across the field to check it out. Meanwhile I totally leave Courtney in the dust! Bryan is on shift, of course! It turns out he was just showing her that he peed on his shorts on accident and couldn't pull up his underwear. It was a good teaching moment about being polite and not peeing outside or in front of girls. And, to tell Mommy or Daddy when you have to go, not to just whip it out! During my lovely teaching moment I hear another mother yell, "Ma'am, uh, your daughter..." Courtney had walked clear across the field and is half way up the stairs to the jungle gym. Holy crap!

I scooped her up and gathered my kids to headed back - a bit embarrassed and wondering what all the other people think of the Kohlers?! Especially, since at this point Courtney was walking dragging Jeremy's bat. Jeremy was proud of his hat full of rocks he collected during practice, rather than actually practicing. And Logan was walking in nothing but a T-shirt, red monkey underwear and blue crocs! All I could do was laugh! The sad thing is that is about par for the course for me!!

Check 1

2009-04-04T11:43:00.003-05:00

Her blood work came in normal for thyroid. On Monday we will have more details as to our next steps and which geneticist we will be seeing.

18 Months and Many Milestones

2009-03-17T22:06:00.006-05:00

So, it has been a difficult couple of months as I have worried about Courtney's growth, lack of teeth, inability to walk, and talk for that matter, but things are looking up! As Courtney turns the corner into her 18th month of life she has not one, but two little white specks pushing through her top gums! This was huge for us since we are in the process of getting blood work done to rule out any endocrine issues such as hypo pituitary or hypo thyroid problems.

Not only can Courtney walk, but she can talk!!! Exactly 6 months after she was implanted (not activated) she said her first word, "Uh-oh!" It has taken me a couple of days for it all to sink in. My little girl who is profoundly deaf has been able to hear me tell her over and over again, "Uh-oh," when something drops to the ground, and now she too, can say it - she can hear!

This is a long way from here! The sorrow and devastation we felt 9 months ago is slowly fading away. I never thought I would drop so much stuff just to hear her sweet voice! Here are a few other things she knows (receptively) with no visual cues:

No
Sit on your bottom
Knock, Knock (she will knock)
Wave bye-bye
Blow kisses
Do you want more? (She will nod her head yes)
Where's the horsey, Mommy, or Daddy? (Points)
Ball

We love you Baby Girl! We can't wait for the next 9 months to unfold to see what all you can do!

Congratulations Bryan!

2009-02-18T23:03:00.003-06:00

Congratulations on your promotion to Specialist, or in civilian terms "driver". I am so proud of you and all of your accomplishments. All of your hard work has paid off and you deserve nothing but the best! Through this crazy year you have stayed strong, helped me keep my feet on the ground and followed your dreams. I can't thank you enough for all that you do for our family. You are an amazing example to me and our beautiful children. I know this promotion was bitter sweet leaving your 18's family, but a new chapter has just begun and I am sure it will be just as good, if not better.

I hope your first shift at 17's C shift was as good as you hoped it would be and as Jeremy says every night during his prayers while you are gone, "Please watch over Daddy and keep him safe while he is at the fire station...."

We love you!

Quick Poll

2009-02-16T21:50:00.002-06:00

I am just curious... for those parents whose kids were late teethers, how old were they when one finally popped through?

Results

2009-02-16T21:37:00.003-06:00

I realized that I didn't post an update about Courtney's test results... They were normal, well at least a normal infection that should be able to be treated with antibiotic ear drops. So we had to finish out the week (Friday) doing ear drops and were told, "Just give us a call if there is anymore drainage." The next day our audiologist gave us a quick crash course on how to use an otoscope, sent us on our way and said to check for any drainage in her ear on Sunday.

Bryan and I were a bit skeptical on how this would work since you can't poke it in too far or it will hurt her, have to all but strap her down to look in her right ear, and have to hold the otoscope a certain way to move with her head when she moves so we don't jam the tip in her ear. So we couldn't check until today when she wasn't so fired up, and yep, you guessed it, there is still fluid in her ear! We were looking for "bone dry" and that wasn't the case. Anything white, green, yellow, etc. would not be good. Since I have only looked in an ear three times, not quite a professional, I wasn't sure what color it was, but it wasn't dry. Luckily, we go back to see our audiologist tomorrow for a mapping and she can give us the for sure thumbs up or down as to whether or not we call good ol' Dr. Syms!

The good thing is she hasn't run any fever. I just would like her right ear to be just as "bone dry" as her left!

A small delight!

2009-02-07T20:56:00.004-06:00

After 16 months and 21 days, Courtney can walk! I knew eventually she would, but with her hearing impairment I was worried something else might be wrong. Even though I knew her brain was more focused on listening and processing sounds than developing her motor skills, I absolutely couldn't wait for her to walk! We are still holding out for teeth, but at least we know they are up there somewhere!

This is just the treat our family needed as we wait for the results on Monday to find out what is causing Courtney to have an ear infection since December 23rd! Dr. Syms took three cultures on Thursday and we are hoping it is nothing serious. We may have to consult with an infectious disease doctor depending on the results. So... we shall see!

Happy Birthday Logan!

2009-02-01T21:16:00.003-06:00

Our little LoMan is 3 today and I can't believe it! He keeps us laughing all of the time and is recovering well from his eye surgery on Friday. We had his birthday party in California last weekend with his cousins - what a blast! Today Bryan is on shift so a friend of mine, Logan, Jeremy, Courtney and I had a lazy day, hung out and had cupcakes.

We love you LoMan!

First Place

2009-01-03T21:30:00.004-06:00

During Bryan's early teens he started BMX bike racing. He was pretty good at it and continued off and on until we had Jeremy. Since Jeremy learned how to ride a bike he has become more interested in BMX bikes and racing. Bryan could not be more excited to have his son interested in something he did! We found a racing bike on Craig's List for Jeremy on Thursday and went to pick it up in Austin. It just so happened that there was a race at the Lonestar track in San Antonio.

We loaded everyone up in the car and off to SA we went. The kids all had a great time despite the cold weather. Bryan was quite nervous as to whether or not Jeremy was really going to like it when he got out on the track. Let me tell you, he had nothing to worry about! After a few practice runs, and several crashes, Jeremy along with three other 5 and under riders took the track. Jeremy not only won the first moto, he smoked 'em!!

Because he won the first moto he automatically qualified for the main race. I am not sure who was more nervous for the race, Bryan or Jeremy! Before Jeremy's big race they had a cookie monster run where Logan got to race his hot wheel and loved it.

After Logan's victory stroll it was time for Jeremy to race again. Oh, he was the cutest thing you have ever seen! He took off, pedaled the entire time and took first place! He did so good!! Bryan was so proud of him, we all were. He got a first place plaque that is already hung on the wall. However, we overheard him tell Gigi that Logan got the best prize for "winning" his race, Little Debbie donuts. We had to laugh!

Catching Up!

2008-12-09T19:58:00.005-06:00

Courtney continues to amaze all of us. At her last hearing test she was almost hearing at the normal range across all frequencies. We all got a little emotional because we just couldn't believe it. She is now waving hi and bye bye with no visual cues. Shakes her head no when you say, "No." She babbles mama, nana, moo, ah ah, and screeches at the sight of her brothers. Tonight she heard our clock sing for the first time - I have waited a long time for that! And, she pointed and waved up to her baby dolls when I said, "Night night baby dolls." (No visual cues) She really can hear! I haven't done a very good job documenting her progress, I better get on it for 2009.

We did have a scare a few weeks ago since she is 15 months and still doesn't have any teeth. However, x-rays confirmed she has teeth, she is just taking her time getting them in! I was freaking out! Just to reassure me, the receptionist at the dentist office sent me a copy of the x-ray. I am tempted to frame it! Ha! Other than an upper respiratory infection a few weeks ago and a current ear infection she is doing great!

Jeremy continues to love school and is reading better and better everyday. He loves all of his teachers and is still quite the story teller. He is so good with his brother and sister - always helping them from putting Courtney's coils back on to putting on Logan's socks and shoes to go outside. I can't believe he is already half way through kindergarten! Where has the time gone!

As for Logan... he is a mess. We can sum Logan up in one story that I will make short. While he and Jeremy were eating a snack he decided to get on top of the dining room table and jump. When he did his head hit the light fixture which is like a giant bowl, and it shattered into a billion pieces. Somehow, we didn't have to go to the ER even though Jeremy sparkled with glass, including his ears! Just a few, and I mean a few, tiny cuts between the two of them and one GIANT mess to clean up! Logan is always into something if it isn't jumping on the table when no one is looking it is baby powdering his room, breaking ornaments, or hair spraying our room! We still love him all the same!

We also found out last week that Logan will be having eye surgery in BOTH eyes the day before his birthday on January 30th. It is an outpatient procedure and should take between an hour and a half to an hour and forty-five minutes. After Courtney's six hour surgery I feel like I can do anything! They said he would be fine to have a party the next day, just his eyes will be red. That is definitely reassuring!

For Christmas this year the kids made a special request for Santa to come this morning since Daddy had to work today until tomorrow. They thought that was pretty cool and can't wait until Bryan gets home tomorrow to open up the rest of the presents under the tree. Since I am off for a few weeks I am hoping to post a few pictures soon.

I hope everyone has a very merry Christmas!

Still Sad

2008-11-09T21:32:00.003-06:00

I wish I could say that I was one of those moms who is totally okay with Courtney's hearing loss and has accepted it and moved on, but I am not. I know she will be okay, we will do everything in our power to make sure of it. She has her CIs, she is making progress, but my heart still aches when I see her big, round, beautiful, hazel eyes absorbing the world around her. At least once a day I say to myself, "I can't believe you are deaf Little Girl."

It almost seems that the calm after the storm has hit and I am finally feeling again. We went 90 miles per hour from diagnosis to bilateral CIs all in a matter of 3months. I am getting used to all of the stares and questions (which I appreciate so much more than the whispers), but it isn't easy. I don't know if it is because she is so small and has so much equipment on her head or if it is because the equipment we have lights up?

I think it is the small things that make me sad. When she snuggles up and leans her head to "give love" the coils fall off and she can't hear us. When she doesn't feel good and wakes up from a nap upset, she can't hear me soothe her. She can't hear us come in anytime when she wakes up for that matter. If I want to rock her, the coils fall off. She can't hear the kid songs in the car because the coils fall off. Fall off, fall off, fall off!

I know that someday this daily lump in my throat will one day disappear, but for today I am still sad.

Behind

2008-11-05T20:13:00.004-06:00

I am a little behind on my blogging life and I have to say I miss it. Things around here seem to have slowed down for the moment so I am taking advantage of the time I have. Courtney is doing amazing and we are very anxious to see how she does at her hearing test next week. Here is another clip of her and her growing receptive vocabulary. We realize that she may not be understanding exactly what we are saying, but she is definitely correlating the inflections in our voices to mean something without visual clues...

Halloween was a great time. We went to our church trunk or treat the Wednesday before Halloween where all three kids humored their mother by dressing up as Dorothy, the Scarecrow and the Tin Man. They were so cute. On the actual day of Halloween, however, Jeremy was convinced by his little friend, Malia, to be Superman and she would be Super Girl. There was no convincing him otherwise. So, on Halloween Jeremy went as Superman, Courtney as Dorothy and Logan as the Scarecrow. We went over to Mike and Angie's for dinner and then off to trick or treat with quite the gang!

On Saturday Bryan decided to take the boys camping at Canyon Lake. They had the best time. They rode their bikes, swam, roasted marshmallows and even got to sleep in a tent! Next time Courtney and I will have to go!

I am having technical difficulties with my computer and I am not able to upload any pictures of Halloween and the camping trip, but as soon as I can I will get them up.

New Sounds!

2008-10-31T16:32:00.005-05:00

Since Courtney's activation on October 3rd she has begun to make baby noises. It warms our hearts every time we hear her!

Activation Clip

2008-10-22T21:00:00.007-05:00

This is a clip of Courtney during her initial activation. It was a long day, but she did great! At this point during the mapping they were adjusting her second ear (left). She was hooked up to a computer so only she could hear the sound. After several times of all of us pointing to the screen when we heard a sound, Courtney did it all on her own. It was amazing! She now points up every morning when we first put on her CIs and throughout the day when she hears specific sounds. She is also beginning to make more baby gurgling noises, and it feels so good to hear them! It truly is an amazing journey!

(Be sure to press stop on the music bar on the right before you play the clip.)

A Week of Firsts

2008-10-12T14:01:00.013-05:00

This past week has been a week of firsts. We started off on Saturday in a bit of a frenzy getting ready for Courtney's birthday party. Bryan was on shift and Jeremy had a soccer game at noon. After Mom's quick run to Walmart we loaded the kids in the car and headed to Jeremy's game. I dropped Jeremy and Mom off and went on a food run. I returned just in the nick of time to see Jeremy score his first goal! Oh, he was so cute!! He threw both hands up in the air and cheered with excitement. He quickly scanned the sidelines and found us - just beaming from ear to ear. I wish I had it on film! They also won for the fist time, too!

After the big game we came home, cleaned up, and wrapped up the finishing touches for the birthday party. We had a great turn out. 25-30 of our friends came to celebrate Courtney's birthday. I know first birthdays are usually more for the parents, but this one really was. Even if Little Girl didn't give us a reaction when we all sang happy birthday to her, we knew she could hear us.

On Sunday Jeremy learned how to ride his two wheel bike! He had such a good time with Bryan and now wants to ride his bike everyday after he gets home from school.

To round out the last few days, Courtney got her first goose egg on her forehead! Logan didn't have any firsts, but he sure loves to play with his brother! I have so much more to update, but out of time and energy. I am working on getting the video clips of the activation and a few others up on the blog for all to see. It has been an emotional, exhausting journey, but amazing all at the same time.

Activation Day

2008-10-05T21:44:00.004-05:00

Friday, October 3rd was activation day. What a day! That morning we met with Dr. Syms so he could take a look at her incisions and clear her to go to Sunshine Cottage to be "turned on". Everything went well and we will return to see him on the 17th.

We had a few hours to kill in San Antonio before our 2:30 appointment so my mom, Bryan, Courtney and I had lunch and bought an internal battery for our video camera so we could capture the moment. We thought we had all of this time until one hour before the big moment we turned on the video camera and saw nothing but a black screen! Thank goodness for Best Buy!! By 2:10pm we were plugged in and charging up our new camcorder!!

We all felt pretty emotional walking into Sunshine Cottage. I became flooded with many of the same emotions I had the first day Bryan and I went there with Courtney. It all seemed surreal again. I felt my emotions brewing. I didn't want to have high expectations in the event that she didn't respond at all or cried, I just was unsure about it all. At the same time, I couldn't believe in 3 short months all that had happened. My mom finally was able to experience and feel the hope that this little school for deaf children gave us. She was touched by the "normal" chatter and excitement of a Friday at an elementary school. It definitely wasn't quiet!

There were 7 of us in the little tiny audiology office for Courtney's big day. I wasn't sure where to watch or what to do, but luckily they have a mirror so we could see her face no matter where we were sitting. Before we began we were informed that all 22 electrodes were in and all 22 functioning!! Very good! After a few adjustments on the computer, Jacque, our audiologist, told us she may hear something. She did and we absolutely scared her to death. I didn't know if I should cry with her because she was so scared or cry because I was so happy she was hearing something! I was able to keep my composure and we all were told to put our happy faces on while Jacque adjusted the levels.

Besides it being totally impossible to keep the processors on, Courtney did absolutely amazing! We were able to do the first mapping of the right ear and will return on Wednesday to do the left. After about 2 hours into it and all of us pointing to our ears when we heard the sound and then to the screen to start conditioning her, that little girl heard something and pointed her little finger all by herself to the screen. At first we thought it was a fluke, but then she kept doing it, it was AMAZING!

After about 3 hours of mapping she was exhausted, we all were. By this point overwhelmed was an understatement! Saturday didn't go so well and we only were able to keep the CIs on for 2.5 hours. Today, however, was great! A little toupee tape goes a long way! Courtney is so little that none of the baby accoutrements fit her, but we are hopeful that once her incisions heal it will get a little easier.

Here are a few pictures from post op to today!

Surgery and Recovery

2008-09-28T13:48:00.005-05:00

Surgery was a success!

It was definitely a long day, but in the end it was successful. We arrived to Methodist in San Antonio at 6am. While we were waiting we learned that Courtney's surgery wasn't until 10am and we could have arrived at 8am. Luckily Julie, our Parent Advisor with Sunshine Cottage, arrived with the most delicious cinnamon rolls ever. We all decided we wouldn't have slept anyways so it was no big deal.

We waited together (Bryan, myself, Julie and my mom aka Momo) on the 9th floor in the surgery holding area where we were to come later and finish recovering. Courtney was in good spirits despite not having eaten since 6pm the night before. She took a little nap and by 9am they took us down to sub-level 2 for surgery. Momo and Julie went to the surgery waiting area and Bryan and I took her back. After about 30 minutes we felt like something wasn't quite right. Sure enough they had it in her chart that she was allergic to penicillin and she is not. Once we got all of that straightened out we met with the Dr. Syms, the anesthesiologist, and the nurses. After I met everyone I felt much better and confident in the hands I was giving her to. One of the nurses was pregnant and due in November so I felt like Courtney had a little friend in there with her!

After the doctors left I put on my marshmallow suit and walked her back to the OR. I could feel the emotions brewing, but when I laid her down it almost felt like I was laying her down for a nap at home. She turned her little head to the left, started sucking her thumb and that was it. One of the nurses walked me out to the waiting room where I met Momo, Bryan, Julie and our friend Kim aka Wright. Just about all of us cried.

The nurses were great. They called when the surgery actually started which was about an hour after I took her into the OR and every hour to two hours there after. It was a long wait. We talked, ate, slept, played a word game, and laughed to get us through. The last hour was the worst. I became anxious and had an overwhelming desire to see her. First the audiologist came out with two big boxes from Cochlear Corporation and a koala bear (complete with a CI). He told us Dr. Syms was finishing up and she did great. He also tested the implants and had a response in both ears. About 15 minutes later Dr. Syms and his nurse came out and said everything went great as planned. RELIEF!! A few minutes later the anesthesiologist came in and escorted me back to recovery where I could finally see my sweet baby girl.

She was definitely out of it and didn't look like her, but none the less it was good to hold her. While I was back there they needed to take two x-rays. During this process her IV ripped out of her foot, but she seemed to be okay and didn't need to put it back in at that time. She threw up a few times even after a dose of fenagrin which is when the craziness began.

At first the nurses were tyring to convince me that it was normal to be throwing up and it was just phlegm. I wasn't buying it. I remained calm and they eventually took us back up to the 9th floor where she continued to vomit after yet another shot of fenagrin. About an hour later she started to run fever so they decided to admit her to Children's. Thank goodness. She had a difficult time with the medicine and anesthesia that made her vomit which in turn made her dehydrated and run fever.

Since she became dehydrated they had to put another IV. After a LONG night and a lot of fluids she bounced right back! We were thankful we were admitted because she bled more than normal in her right ear and had to have the bandages changed. She cried more during that than redoing the IV - it was awful! Luckily by Saturday morning she was almost back to her normal self! Dr. King, Dr. Syms associate, came in and gave us a thumbs up to go home. By 12:30pm we were on our way home.

I am so amazed at how great she is doing. My mom and I gave her Tylenol not because she was acting in pain, but because we thought she had to be. I know I would be if someone cut into my head, but she is doing awesome! I haven't allowed myself to even think about activation day, and now that I know she has made it through surgery, it is all I can think about! I simply can't wait.

Thank you all so much for your kind words, prayers and happy thoughts. We couldn't have done it with out them!

Tomorrow's the Day

2008-09-25T20:53:00.003-05:00

Okay, it's official I am nervous and freaking out! I know in my head everything will be fine tomorrow, but I keep envisioning handing my baby girl over to complete strangers. I am just not sure how I am going to do it! At the same time, it is so exciting how close Courtney is to hearing. We have planned her birthday party for October 11th so she can hear us sing to her. A special request by her daddy.

I will call those that I can and the rest please check back for an update tomorrow night or Saturday morning. The boys will be well taken care of with Bobpa as they are headed off to the county fair tomorrow. Thank you Momo and Bobpa!!

Happy 1st Birthday Baby Girl!

2008-09-17T23:37:00.001-05:00

We won!

2008-09-10T22:36:00.004-05:00

For the past two weeks we have been battling the insurance company to cover simultaneous bilateral cochlear implants and we finally won!! After involving my husband's employee benefits manager, more than one UHC manager, the UHC account representative for my husband's employer, Let Them Hear, our doctor, family and several friends we appealed and the decision was overturned. It was definitely an emotional rollercoaster!

In the end Baby Girl will get her CIs as scheduled on September 26th. Yahoo! Thank you all for your many prayers and positive thoughts. Mom...I can't thank you enough for everything you did from daily phone calls to research to just being a mom. Thank you!

Denied

2008-08-27T21:32:00.002-05:00

We are on quite the journey! I prepared myself that we would probably have to file an appeal with our health insurance to cover simultaneous bilateral cochlear implants. I did not, however, think that they wouldn't even cover one! I have a plan. I know what we need to do, and will do it. She will have her surgery on September 26th and they will cover both of them that day. I will fight, I will advocate.

What I don't understand is the justification for denying the coverage: Sensorinueral hearing loss is not a medical condition. As for the simultaneous bilateral portion, that is because they claim that the treatment is not consistent with published clinical evidence. Bilateral CIs are unproven.

Not a medical condition? I just don't understand!

Jeremy's first day of kindergarten!

2008-08-25T20:45:00.003-05:00

I don't think I have seen a kid more excited for school than Jeremy. He could hardly wait to get to Mrs. Bowers class. There wasn't an ounce of hesitation in him. He seemed to have had a great first day and is most certainly looking forward to tomorrow.

From Dad

2008-08-24T22:17:00.002-05:00

This is my first post to the Blog. Karen and I decided to add some music for your listening pleasure, and that's where I come in. I LOVE music, and all kinds as you can tell by our playlist. It breaks my heart every day that my daughter won't be able to enjoy music the way that I do. I ask myself all the time "Why Courtney?" How can this little angel not hear me when I tell her goodnight and and I love you, or when I play the radio in the car, how did this happen?? I think about it on my drives to the station ( about an hour ) and it just breaks my heart. I know with CI's that she will be able to have a great and fairly normal life ( thank God for technology ), but it still makes me want to cry when a great song comes on and I know that Courtney won't be able to hear it like I do. I know that this may sound somewhat trivial to some, given the fact that she'll be able to hear and aquire language with the CI's, which I am so thankful for that words cannot express. I guess I'm just a little on the sad side that I may not be able to share my passion of music with her like I do with my boys. Reality can be tough sometimes. I know this post was on the random side, but I felt like yappin' a little bit after we did the playlist on here. The songs on here just reminded Karen and I of our times together when we first met up to the present time. They jump all over the place, but I felt this Blog just wasn't complete without some music. Thank you all for replying to my wife on here, I know it really helps.

70dB

2008-08-23T16:27:00.007-05:00

Last Thursday Courtney had a hearing test. I was a little apprehensive about going by myself because the last time she had one was one week after we found out about her hearing loss and it was all I could do to keep myself from sobbing. I knew she had been hearing somethings, but I didn't want to get my hopes up.

At our session at Sunshine Cottage on Tuesday we discussed the speech banana. For those who don't know, the speech banana represents the range needed to acquire speech. I have included a sample audiogram that illustrates the speech banana and other levels of hearing. Normal hearing is in the 0-25dB range which would mean that a person could hear everything from 25dB until 110dB and beyond. Each level of hearing loss has a range and Courtney, being profoundly deaf, is in the 90 -120dB range. When she had her ABR done she had no response in either ear at 125dB. She can't even hear herself let alone a jet plane!

Typically, with hearing aids you can move up about 30dB's. It is also much easier to hear the low sounds (staying to the left on the audiogram) such as the hum of a lawn mower, or for speech the "mm" and "baba" sounds. Courtney, with her hearing aids on, was able to respond to speech sounds at 70dB! This explains why she heard a vacuum, hairdryer, bells, and occasionally, Bryan's voice. After we celebrated her hearing a sound in the booth, she would ever so sweetly look up and smile as if to say, "Mommy, I did it, I did it!" It was amazing. She went up by over 50dB, way to go girl! She has also been making a lot more noises, including "mmm". Most likely it is because aided she can hear herself making that sound.

As you can see, she is only at the 70dB level which isn't enough to acquire speech, but does means she is still a prime candidate for cochlear implants. The hearing test confirmed our decision to do simultaneous bilateral cochlear implants and the fact that she is hearing something. This is stimulating her brain and laying the pathways for when she does get her CIs. Basically, when we turn her on, it won't be the very first time for her to hear anything at all. They think that it will help her to be more successful with the CIs when she gets them.

So, if we can get through to the insurance company to see if they will pay for bilateral simultaneous CIs, we will be good to go!

September 26th

2008-08-19T15:23:00.003-05:00

The surgery date has been set! September 26th, 7:30am at Methodist Hospital in San Antonio. We decided to go ahead and do simultaneous bilateral CIs. Bryan and I have agonized over what the best thing for Courtney would be, and we feel confident that doing two at the same time is what is right for us. I almost feel relieved to have made the decision and can move forward and mentally prepare for the 6 hour surgery.

We have been attending Sunshine Cottage regularly and have a new Parent Advisor, Julie, who is wonderful. The past few sessions have been about CIs, audiograms, and the infamous speech banana. Bryan and I both still feel so thirsty for information. I honestly don't know how anyone could get through all of this without the help of a school such as Sunshine Cottage. What a blessing to be so close to such an amazing place!

Jeremy will start kindergarten on Monday. I can't believe it! He has been counting down the days and absolutely cannot wait! He and Bryan had a father son weekend and went to Houston to see an Astros game, went swimming, school clothes shopping, and no trip is complete without a visit to the Bass Pro Shop. Thursday is meet the teacher night so we will go, drop off his school supplies, and meet his teacher.

Logan is our little stink! He is nothing but trouble! He is talking more and more and still loves to play baseball. We go back to Dr. McCash on September 2nd to find out if the 2 hour patching prescription is working. I sure hope so because I can't imagine trying to get him to wear it any longer!

Bryan and I are doing well and certainly keeping busy! My company will be doing some work out in California for at least the next 3 years so we are very excited about that. I am definitely enjoying being able to stay home with Courtney Tuesdays and Thursdays, but I know next week will be a rude awakening for all of us having to get up so early for school!

Poll

2008-08-15T21:33:00.004-05:00

On Tuesday we returned to Dr. Syms for our CT scan results. Everything seemed to check out normal and Courtney is definitely a candidate for cochlear implants. We discussed the risks and benefits and once again came across the gut wrenching decision as to do one or two.

For parents of those who didn't have the option to do simultaneous bilateral CIs and could do it again would you do one or both? For those parents who are waiting until 12 months to do a CI, what would you do? And for those individuals who have gone from one to two, do you recommend it?

Any feedback would be great!

Ring, Ring, Ring!

2008-08-08T21:28:00.003-05:00

Yesterday we saw Courtney, officially, turn in the direction of sound! Little Miss Sassy Pants turned to the sound of two different types of bells and one set of small symbols while we were playing a listening game at Sunshine Cottage. I was so focused on what my part of the game was - to point to my ear and say, "Mommy hears a bell. Ring, ring, ring," that I almost missed the moment! I never seem to be one that gets emotional in the moment, but when I reflect back I realize that that was the first time we have ever seen her respond (turn her head) to any type of sound. Hope!

We need that hope because we have made the decision to do simultaneous bilateral cochlear implants pending the CT scan results next week. We will keep you posted!

Much Better

2008-07-29T20:52:00.005-05:00

The hearing aid vs. teether war might be coming to an end with the glorious help of a bonnet! Thank you to all who responded with tips and ideas, it certainly helped! It's too hot for pilot caps, but not for bonnets!

Today we had another excellent meeting with Lisa and Jacque at Sunshine Cottage. Everyday Bryan and I find ourselves with more and more questions. It is so nice to know that every week we are able to have answers to our many questions. One question that Bryan and I continue to struggle with is whether or not we should do one or two CIs in September. There are good reasons and research to support both options. I keep coming back to the idea that we do have two ears for a reason! I just don't know.

On another note we think that the hearing aids might be providing Courtney with some benefit. We discussed how unusually tired Courtney has been this past week, especially after she has worn her hearing aids for a while. This may be because she is hearing. However, distinguishing the sound is something different. The way that Lisa explained it was turning on a static radio all day long and having us try to make sense of it. We would be tired too! Courtney also turned two separate times when Bryan called out, "No, no, no!" from behind. It was as if she heard something, but wasn't sure what or where it came from.

Only time will tell what benefit, if any, Courtney is receiving from the hearing aids. Even if it was a fluke it was a welcomed glimmer of hope.

Logan is doing fabulous with his eye patch! He wore it for 3.5 hours the past two nights when he only has to for 2 hours! I figured it wouldn't hurt and if it wasn't bothering him, I wasn't going to take it off! So far a much better week for the Kohlers!

HELP WANTED

2008-07-24T22:19:00.004-05:00

Okay, I am taking it to the people.... How do you keep the hearing aids in a 10 month old? What about while driving by yourself in the car? Do you even try? I put them in and she takes them out at least once before we even leave the driveway. When we received them yesterday they told us the left earmold may need to be re-done and we may get a lot of feedback. We do, so do I continue putting that hearing aid on? Has anyone had this problem? Are we sure all of this poking and prodding isn't hurting?

Any help would be GREATLY appreciated.

New Look

2008-07-23T20:13:00.008-05:00

It is only Wednesday and this has been a big week for the Kohlers. Two of the five have a new look! On Monday we took Logan to the Pediatric Opthamologist to follow up on his esophoria. As it turns out we will now begin treating amblyopia (lazy eye). This develops when one eye is used more than the other, causing the less used eye's vision to become weak. To treat it Logan will have to wear a patch on his good eye (left) for two hours every day to try to improve the vision in his right eye. Once the vision is equal to his good eye they will, more than likely, do surgery to straighten his right eye. Apparently there are two issues, poor vision and alignment. If we correct the vision through patching he will have a greater chance of his eyes working together after surgery. Fortunately, we don't have to worry about glasses anymore, just the patch!

The first day we only made it 45 minutes and an hour and 15 minutes today. The only way we could get him to do it was to use a timer. If he was still wearing his patch when the timer went off he could pick out a treat. Jeremy joined in the festivities and has been a pirate right along with Logan.

My Pirates

Today Courtney got her hearing aids! She did great! I had a lot of anxiety about what they would look like, what would people think, how she was going to do, how I would feel, etc. While we were at Sunshine Cottage we practiced putting them in and taking them out several times. She didn't seem to mind at all. We were all quite impressed with her. It wasn't until we were driving home that we caught her with them in her mouth. Once all of the fun distractions were gone, her tiny fingers would creep up and snatch one out. I would take it away, she would cry until she would find the other one and put it in her mouth. We did two rounds of this before we decided we should wait to put them in again until we were at home where we had better distractions.

Overall, she did awesome! We go back to Sunshine Cottage next Tuesday for more techniques and strategies. This week we are to focus on keeping the aids on and not asking her, "Can you hear that?" You don't realize how bad you really want to say that, it's kind of funny! Here are a few other things we are to do:

Keep a happy face on when putting the hearing aids on - we want Courtney to associate them to something positive.
Point to our ears when we hear something and say, "I hear a ..., that's a ....." so she will begin associating sound to ears.
Label everything auditorally (i.e. call Jeremy and Logan by their name not The Boys)
Don't use pronouns - everything has a name.
Don't panic!

Our hope now is that we don't find Jeremy or Logan with a hearing aid on or Courtney wearing a patch! It will be a miracle if we can keep everything and everyone straight! Tomorrow we are back to San Antonio for Courtney's CT scan.

Daddy and Courtney

Courtney's New Profile

California

2008-07-18T22:01:00.011-05:00

We had an amazing time in California, but definitely did not want to come home! Going a day early gave us even more time to spend with friends and family. We started off our adventure with one night in Santa Rosa, picked up Jeremy who we hadn't seen for 6 weeks, and were off to Clear Lake for some R and R, visit with Aunt Pam and friends and Jeremy's 5th birthday. Unfortunately, it was so hot we just about melted and felt like we were back in Texas! It was even 109 one day!

After a few days in Clear Lake we came back to Santa Rosa and then headed up to Sonora to see Gigi, Grandpa, Aunt Debbie, Uncle Pat, and cousins Ryan, Matt and Mark. While we were there we went up to Pine Crest, one of Bryan's old camping stomping grounds. For some reason we have ALWAYS had some fluke thing happen to us while we are on vacation. This time we had a bat incident. Not a baseball bat, but a black bat with wings and all! To make a long story short a bat flew or fell, we aren't sure, into our spot at Pine Crest near the beach. After Bryan and Mark tried flicking it away with a sand shovel, the darn thing took a flying leap onto Jeremy who was in the water! Complete panic hit us all. Fortunately, Jeremy had a life jacket on and Bryan and Mark moved a lightening speed to get it off. There were no bites and in the end the bat tested negative for rabies so no shots. Yahoo!

After our bat adventure we went to Concord after stopping for lunch with Uncle Dave in Tracy. In Concord we were able to see Grandpa Charlie, Aunt Brooke, Aunt Jennie and cousins Zak and Maddie. We were even able to zip over to Sacramento for a quick dinner with Grandma Courtney. To finish out the trip we ended up back in Santa Rosa where we hung out with Aunt Tiffany, Aunt Kathy, Uncle Kevin and cousins Riley, Laney and Baby Kyle. We arrived back in hot, humid Texas late Wednesday night and are back to the daily grind!

Next week we have an eye appointment for Logan, two appointments for Courtney, one of which we hope she will get her hearing aids (Sunshine Cottage and ECI), a CT scan for Courtney (sedated) and I have a dentist appointment! Nothing like a little dose of reality when you return home from vacation!

Here are a few of our favorite pictures from our trip. Enjoy!

Off to California

2008-07-04T15:38:00.003-05:00

We had several appointments this past week and got the "okay" to go to California! We decided to leave a day earlier so I will make this post quick and to the point. The appointments went well. We absolutely LOVE Sunshine Cottage and the people there. It is truly an amazing place. We are even contemplating sending not only Courtney, but Jeremy and Logan there if that is the route Courtney will be able to take. On Wednesday we went there to enroll in the Parent Infant Program. They gave us a lot of wonderful information and did hearing aid molds for Baby Girl. They took a picture of Courtney while they were doing this, she was so good and it looked like she had pink bubble gum coming out of her ears. As soon as I receive the picture I will post it.

We also met with Dr. Bonilla who followed up on last week's procedure and diagnosis. Her official medical definition is Profound Sensorineural Hearing Loss (PSHL). Basically, we were gently handed over to Dr. Syms (Neurotologist) who we met with yesterday.

Thursday was a bit more emotional as they did several hearing tests which Courtney failed. My head knows she will, but my heart still isn't communicating properly with my head! We have many options, but he will do a cochlear implant the week of her first birthday if we decide. Dr. Syms feels strongly that we should only do one implantation because after that she can only ever have a cochlear implant in that ear. The key isn't hearing, it is if she can hear well enough to acquire speech. If she can with one implant then we will wait because there is some amazing research and they have re-created the inner ears on several animals and then passed ABRs. Of course, if she isn't doing well enough before theses medical advances and technology, then we will implant both. As long as she is acquiring speech we can keep one and save the other!! The window of opportunity for the cochlear implants is from 1 year of age to 3. However, we want to do the cochlear implant at 1 if she is still a candidate.

So much for a quick update! We return to Dr. Syms in August and will have a CT scan before we see him to determine what our next steps will be. Because of Courtney's profound hearing loss the hearing aids may not work, but again, we have to exhaust all options.

That is it in a nutshell. Yahoo, we are off to California!

Positive

2008-06-28T17:41:00.007-05:00

It seems as if an eternity has gone by since Wednesday. We have learned A LOT about ears, auditory nerves, hearing aids, cochlear implants, evaluations, hearing tests and the list goes on! However, we are feeling positive and optimistic about Courtney's situation, at least right now...

The Sunshine Cottage has been an excellent resource for us and we have our first meeting with them this Wednesday morning. They have already sent us our enrollment forms for the Parent Infant Program which we will need to bring with us when we go. While we are there they will fit Courtney for hearing aids. We don't know at this point if they will work, but we have to exhaust all options. Any help from them is better than nothing and it should take about two weeks before we will get them. Fortunately, the hearing aids and the program are free until she is 3 years old. We just have to commit to going once per week to parenting sessions where we will learn techniques and strategies to help Courtney and our whole family. One of the Parent Infant Advisors, who has a profoundly deaf child, shared with us her story which offered much comfort and support. When I asked if Courtney truly has the possibility to be auditory and verbal, her response was, "Yes! I can tell you unequivocally, yes!" A brief moment of relief and hope.

In the afternoon on Wednesday we also have an appointment with Dr. Bonilla (Ped.ENT). We spoke with him Friday morning and he wants to wait to do a CT and/or MRI scan until we meet with Dr. Sims (Neurotologist) on Thursday. He doesn't want to radiate her until it is absolutely necessary. In the future to determine if Courtney is a good candidate for cochlear implants we will have to have a CT and or MRI to ensure all parts of her ears are atomically correct. From what Bryan and I understand, both doctors will work together and begin full assessments and a complete work up on Courtney this week. Dr. Bonilla is going to "introduce" us to Dr. Sims before our appointment and have the written ABR results to him as well.

Again, we feel very positive about Courtney's future and we are 100% confident we are in good hands. We are trying to take everything one step at a time and educate ourselves on raising a deaf child. A great resource, among many, is http://www.raisingdeafkids.org/ .

"Now is the Time to be Deaf"

2008-06-25T21:31:00.004-05:00

We are definitely in a surreal world today as the Audiologist and ENT told us that Courtney has a profound hearing loss. It just wasn't what we wanted to hear. We are overwhelmed with emotions - heavy heart is an understatement.

Before the procedure the doctors told us it would take about 30 minutes. After an hour and ten minutes or so I finally had them call to see what was going on. She was still in surgery was all they could tell us. Within ten minutes the Audiologist and ENT walked towards us. I knew immediately something was wrong. They normally call you on the phone, but they pulled up a chair to talk. My heart sank and I cried.

They told us she was doing fine, they put the tubes in, but after several tests there was no response in either ear, which translates to a profound hearing loss. Dr. Bonilla discussed that we will grieve and that if we don't now we will at some point. Bryan's eyes began to water and turn red. He told us we will have to begin a series of tests to ensure that there isn't something else in her body causing the hearing loss. We have to schedule a CT scan of her head and brain and see a neurologist to discuss the possibility of cochlear implants. They reassured us that we caught it early and that technology has come a long way in the last ten years. As Bryan put it, "Now is the time to be deaf." The doctor felt that she probably was born with this hearing loss and they are looking into her records as to why and how she passed her newborn hearing screening test. Dr. Bonilla expressed that it is okay to hop on the Internet and to bring any questions, concerns, etc. to our appointment next week where we will discuss Courtney's treatment plan.

After we finished with the Audiologist and Dr.Bonilla they took us back to see Courtney. We both lost it. Seeing our sweet baby girl not awake yet from surgery, knowing that she couldn't hear us was more than we could handle. As we drove home we realized that our whole life changed today. We know that we will do anything and everything we can for her. Tomorrow we are headed to Sunshine Cottage School for the Deaf (www.sunshinecottage.org ) to get more information and sign up for the Parent Infant Program. We aren't sure what to do with ourselves, but we are certainly trying to stay positive.

Thank you all again for your thoughts and prayers. We will keep you posted on our new journey!

On another note...

2008-06-18T21:42:00.003-05:00

Jeremy is having the time of his life in California! We miss him, but are so thankful he is able to have this time with Momo, Bobpa, Gigi, Grandpa and his cousins. He has swam almost everyday and loving every minute of it. We can't wait to see him in July, especially Logan. We love you buddy!

We have hope!

2008-06-18T21:18:00.002-05:00

Today Bryan and I took Courtney to have her hearing test and ENT consult. First, we met with the audiologist to check for fluid and do a hearing test. The test for fluid was consistent with fluid in the ears. Relief. I was so worried that we were going to go in and there wasn't going to be any fluid, I needed some hope. Next, we went into a sound proof room where the audiologist checked her hearing. Again, not even a blink of an eye up to 70 decibels (the most she could do without the use of headphones). Needless to say she completely failed the hearing test which we knew she would.

We then met Dr. Bonilla, an amazing doctor, who confirmed there was fluid in both ears, maybe even more in her right ear. She has had more ear infections in her right ear than her left. He felt that because she passed her hearing screening at birth, the fact that Logan has a history of ear infections and tubes, she has had several ear infections and there was fluid in her ears that there is a good chance that all she needs is tubes. However, to rule everything out he suggested that we do the ABR test at the same time we do the tubes. He also suggested that we do this sooner than later and scheduled the procedure for next Wednesday at 1pm.

Bryan and I felt so good about Dr. Bonilla and that he made the same suggestions that we were prepared to advocate for. Again, relief! He expressed the importance of early detection so we can get the correct treatment needed if there is a hearing loss. If there is he will do a complete health overview to rule out anything else in her system that may be causing the hearing loss.

In the end, he assured Bryan and I that there can be a significant hearing loss with fluid in the ears. We are hopeful that by next Wednesday our baby girl will hear us and turn our way when we call her name. Again, we thank all of you for your thoughts and prayers. We will keep you posted!

Quick Update

2008-06-16T18:41:00.003-05:00

This morning we called the Pediatric ENT and were able to get in on Wednesday. They will do a hearing test and then we will meet with the doctor. We spoke with a lady at The Sunshine Cottage School for the Deaf, www.sunshinecottage.org , where they do hearing evaluations as well, and she said that there is a good chance it could just be fluid in her ears. She recommended that we push for an ABR test if the doctor is going to do tubes. Apparently this is a wonderful test that has to be done in babies older than 6 months under anesthesia. Through this test they can see the sound all the way to the brain and see the brain response. Along the way if there is a hearing loss, it will tell exactly where the problem is. If we can get this test done we will know sooner than later if it is a true hearing loss or not.

She also confirmed that Dr. Bonilla is a great doctor, so we feel that we will be in good hands! Thank you for all of your prayers! Hopefully we will know more Wednesday.

Nothing

2008-06-14T21:21:00.004-05:00

Nothing is what Courtney hears...

She is only 9 months old and has already had 5 ear infections (7 if you count the two that were still infected after one round of antibiotics) and 1 perforated eardrum. All of this prompted our doctor to refer us to a Pediatric ENT for possible tubes. At her last appointment I discussed Courtney not making any sounds other than blowing raspberries. I know you aren't supposed to compare kids, but both Logan and Jeremy were doing this long before 9 months so I was beginning to become concerned. Our NP reassured us not to worry, but to definitely schedule her 1 year check up with the actual doctor just to be sure.

A couple days passed and I couldn't get rid of the feeling that she really should be babbling more. Finally, I decided that if she couldn't hear she wouldn't be able to imitate sounds which might be why she isn't "talking". I had already put Courtney down for bed, but I just had to know if hearing was the problem. We have the never wake a sleeping baby rule at our house, but I went ahead and began a series of "tests".

I walked over to her bed and began quietly calling her name. Nothing. I tapped on the side of the bed and called her name louder. Nothing. I didn't want to wake Logan in the process of all of this, but I really had to know. I thought maybe she is just REALLY tired so I began clapping about six inches from her ear. Nothing, not even a twitch of an eye. My heart sank and the panic set in.

The next day Bryan and I called every ENT from Austin to San Antonio and couldn't get in anywhere. In the meantime I, along with my friends from work, continued to "test" her. We banged pots and pans, snapped, put ringing phones behind her, yelled, anything we could think of and she never responded. We were able to get an appointment with an Audiologist to do a hearing test Tuesday morning and I kept another appointment with a Pediatric Audiologist on Wednesday who will also do a hearing test. I know they will confirm what we already know, but we are hoping that if the eustachian tube isn't working correctly she may have fluid behind her ear which can inhibit hearing. Deep down this is what I desperately hope is the case, but I want to be prepared for the worst.

We are concerned and want to know the cause of the hearing loss so we can move forward with whatever she needs. Our hearts our heavy...the worst thing for a parent, besides losing a child, is that there is something wrong with them. She is so happy and has the sweetest spirit it is difficult to imagine that anything could possibly be wrong with her. As if she knew how sad we were, she did begin waving bye-bye yesterday to warm our hearts! Hopefully she just needs tubes, but we will keep everyone posted.

The Masses

2008-06-08T13:44:00.002-05:00

I finally decided to join the masses and create a blog. I figured it would be easier to keepeveryone updated since I inevitably forget to email someone when I email pictures, etc. We areall doing well and enjoying our summer, especially Jeremy. He is in California and has been there since the end of May. I had to go back for business so I brought him and Courtney, but Gigi (aka Ruthie) and my mom (Momo) talked me into letting him stay until we all come out in July. So far it sounds like he is having the time of his life and doesn't seem to miss us at all. I am not sure if that is good or bad!

Logan is definitely two! He loves baseball and carries around a bat, ball or glove almost all of the time. He is talking more and more and we have decided he will be the clown of the family. Logan still has to wear glasses, but we are going to a pediatric opthomologist in July for further treatment of the esophoria in his right eye. Other than that, he is doing great and his asthma isn't bothering him so that is a plus!

Baby girl is getting bigger everyday. Last week at a follow up appointment she

weighed in at 16 pounds 12 ounces. This is the same as what Logan weighed at his 6 month appointment and Courtney is almost 9 months! She is all girl and I love all the pink, dresses and bows. She absolutely loves her big brothers and is a very good natured baby. (After the first four months!) She is starting to inch along, but seems to be too layed back and doesn't want to sit all by herself. Pretty soon I will be wishing she was just rolling back and forth not getting into everything. We love her all the same!

Bryan and I are great and finally got to get away in May when my parents came to visit. We went to Lakeway Resort and Spa in Lakeway (near Austin) for an extended weekend. We almost didn't know what to do with ourselves, but we had a wonderful time and aren't going to wait 5 years to do it again!